Snacks of Doom (was: Spam)

[Jennifer Piersol]

Pork water -- he he he

Okay, my grossest snack.  I'm risking all my respect (if I even have 
any) here by telling you guys about this, but I want the prize for 
the best worst snack...

I used (yes, used...) to have a fondness for Cool Whip - you know, 
the non-dairy whipped topping found in big blue tubs.  Okay, fondness 
is a little weak... I was obsessed with the stuff.  My dad once 
quipped (ooh, I actually used the word quipped!) that my sister and I 
would eat (the following are his words, not mine) "dog turds" if hers 
had barbecue sauce on it and mine was covered in Cool Whip.  Now, I 
suppose that's taking things a bit far, but perhaps you will agree 
with him after this:

One summer while I was staying at my aunt's house (my mom died when I 
was 8, so she was supposed to be a maternal figure during puberty for 
me), I'd sneak into her refrigerator when she wasn't looking, take a 
slice of cotto salami (the kind in the blister pack that's perfectly 
round and about 4" in diameter - with the little peppercorns in it), 
spread it with cool whip, roll it into a tube so that if anyone 
looked, I could pretend it was cheese or something, and then eat it.  
Yes.  Yucky supermarket salami and cool whip.

Needless to say, I am not proud of myself at this point in my life.  
I've been forever damaged, I think, and can no longer eat anything 
with the word "non-dairy" used to describe it. ;)

Nor can I eat blister-packaged meat.



You asked for it.  Do I win the prize?

Jen (the grossest person on earth... hehehe)