Clueless in Middle Earth (WAS LOTR movie)

[cindysphynx]

I went to see the film last night.  I was totally blown away, as I 
thought it was magnificent!  

So many people have written great reviews that there's not much left 
to say.  But I didn't read the books, so I'll just mention a few 
things from the perspective of someone who knew next to nothing about 
the books before going to the LOTR movie.

1.  I let my 7 year old child come along.  Big mistake.  Wrong, 
wrong, wrong.  Note to self:  young children who go to scary PG-13 
movies keep their eyes closed the whole time, fall asleep in the 
theatre, and then sneak into their parents' bed at night.

2.  I have to admit that I had no idea who most of the characters 
were.  I got Gandolf (and I think Ian McClellan is amazing).  I got 
Frodo (who I really thought was a 14 year old short person or 
something until I saw the actor on Leno last night).  I got Sam and 
the other Hobbits.  I did not get the women *at all.*  I didn't 
understand the Pretty Boy with the Arrows, or the guy who died.  Who 
was that Strider fellow?  Is he the same person as Aragorn?  I have 
resolved to read the book immediately.

3.  Uh, how come some of these people were not cast in HP?  Ian 
McClellan is just way better than Richard Harris.  The guy with the 
braids and metal headband who chaired the meeting (Elrond?) is Sirius 
Black; the other fellowship guy with the beard (Aragorn?) was Lupin.  
I also think the HP filmmakers should start looking for non-Brit 
actors, because Wood really had me believing he is British when he is 
actually from California (according to Leno).  I guess good actors 
can do good accents.

4.  OK, those orcs were just way, way too much and over the top.  
Dang!  I liked the spooky guys on horseback, though, and that 
music/sound they played whenever they came around was really freaking 
me out.  I must go read the book.  

5.  Uh, Frodo puts the ring on and the world dissolves or something.  
I was totally baffled by this.  His sword was magical or something?  
Why is the Kevlar suit so important, other than just conveniently 
saving Frodo from the troll?  I must go read the book.  

6.  The troll scene was way too long.  However, this troll was way 
better than the HP troll, and the visual effects in LotR were 
substantially better overall.

7.  On balance, I think the director of LotR gets hired for future 
LotR films, whereas I gave Columbus his pink slip ages ago.  One huge 
difference was that the LotR director and his gang seemed to make a 
decision that they were going to tell a good, tight story and make 
the tough decisions about what to cut.  As a result, the scenes 
seemed much longer, better thought out, and better acted.  The 
dramatic tension had time to develop.  HP, on the other hand, rushed 
and rushed and rushed and tried to cram everything in.  So we got 
house ghosts popping up to deliver one or two lines.  We got Snape 
sprinting to the front of the class for his potions speech.  I think 
a movie adaptation is more satisfying when it just tries to tell the 
main story rather than function as a trailer for the book and mention 
everything.  Is there any way we can get the LotR director for HP 3 
and 4?

8.  The opening LotR scenes were outstanding.  As I said, I knew 
nothing.  The filmmakers gave me a quickie overview and moved right 
into the main story.  HP, on the other hand, did not do this at all, 
instead spending about half the film kind of establishing the 
wizarding world.  As a result, there was no time to develop the main 
story:  the mystery of the Sorcerer's Stone.  

9.  I am reconsidering my adamant opposition to splitting GoF into 
two movies.  Because I haven't read the trilogy, I actually expected 
our team in LotR to take the ring to that nasty mountain volcano 
thing, chuck it in, and declare victory.  I was stunned when the 
movie just  . . . ended.  But it worked.  So maybe it can work for 
GoF also (although I still think GoF can be cut to make a very good 3-
hour film).

OK, that's enough from me.  I am off to dig up "The Hobbit" and have 
at it from there.

Cindy (who thinks way too many creatures were beheaded in LotR and 
those goblin things couldn't shoot well enough to hit the side of a 
barn, but is willing to overlook it)