[HPFGU-OTChatter] Re: Homosexuality

[Neil Ward]

Did I say I'd shut up?  Ooops!  It must be a full moon or something...

Rita said:

<<I've seen the "How dare you assume I'm heterosexual?" bumper sticker, and
I confess I dislike it. "How dare you assume that Katie Bell is white?"
(when she isn't described at all IIRC) stirs my conscience. "How dare you
assume that Katie Bell is heterosexual?" leads me to answer, in an annoyed
tone of voice, "When I see her wearing a pink triangle button, I'll change
my assumption." If you think that's evidence that I'm a bigot, tell me so.>>

Unless it's not clear, I'm not on a "How dare you...?" soapbox about this.
Personally, I wouldn't say "how dare you assume Katie Bell is heterosexual?"
any more than I would conclude that you, Rita, are a bigot.  I would say,
"we don't know very much about Katie Bell, so why should we assume anything
about her," or I might say, "Katie Bell is such a sketchy figure at the
moment she could be black to one person, and a lesbian to another person and
that's just fine".

Rita also said, in response to my point:

<<"Quite a spectrum"... See my reply to find_sam just above your name
[references to 'pretty much' one thing or another].>>

I was expanding on the point that homosexuality alone is not the definition
of non-heterosexuality (which ties into Ender's point about labels).  For
the record, Kinsey reported 37% of males and 13% of females as having
instances of at least one homosexual experience that resulted in orgasm
during their lives, but, obviously, a much smaller number actually defined
themselves as homosexual, as follows:

10% of males were "predominantly homosexual between the ages of 16 and 55"
8% of males were "exclusively homosexual for at least three years between
the ages of 16 and 55"
4% of white males had been "exclusively homosexual after the onset of
adolescence up to the time of their interviews"

2 to 6% of females, aged 20-35, were "more or less exclusively homosexual in
experience/response"
1 to 3% of unmarried females aged 20-35 were "exclusively homosexual in
experience/response"

I guess this is where I picked up my recollection that approx. 4% of men and
2% of women are gay.

***

Ender said:

<<I haven't seriously dated any ment recently and one of my closest friends
made a statement along the lines of "We'll accept any boyfriend you
choose...or girlfriend."  And i'm thinking "Where did that come from?"
  I haven't dated any men recently, but i haven't dated any women either, so
why was homosexuality assumed in this case? >>

They didn't assume homosexuality, they simply allowed for the possibility,
which is refreshing.  I think that's a wonderfully supportive thing for a
friend to say.  If you were gay, wouldn't you feel that you could confide in
that friend and that they would love you just the same?  If you weren't,
would you really feel offended by the fact that your friend allowed for it?
Fear of rejection by friends and family is a really big deal for some gay
people.

Ender also said:

<<Michael Stipe stated in a magazine article years ago that he is bisexual,
but people still talk about his sexuality as if it's a huge, intriguing
mystery.>>

Not any more. He recently announced that he is gay.  He probably got fed up
of all that pointless tittle tattle. Great new album, BTW. <g>

Neil
________________________________________

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