Tom Swifites

[Jim Flanagan]

                       Ministry of Magic
             Bureau for the Defence of Magical Humour
                         3 March, 2001


Dear Ms. Crustum:

Thank you for you submission of 3 March.  However, The Department 
must inform you that your "Tom Swiftie" was not written in proper 
form. Please note that canonical "Swifties" *must* adhere to the 
following formal structure:

"<statement>," <name> <said, asked, inquired, implored, etc.>, 
<adverb>.

In your initial submission, '"The mirror in the Boy's dorm always 
seems sad," Harry reflected.' lacked the obligatory adverb, and 
should, accordingly, be rewritten thusly:

"The mirror in the Boy's dorm always seems sad," Harry said, 
reflectively.

Failure to mend your ways in the very near future will result in 
removal of the "W" key from your keyboard, and we all know how 
traumatic *that* can be.

                             Yours Retentively, etc.

                             Anal P. Lardbhottom
                             Department of Canonical Swifties


--- In HPFGU-OTChatter at y..., "Doreen" <nera at r...> wrote:
> 
>   ----- Original Message ----- 
>   From: Morsus Crustum 
>   To: HPFGU-OTChatter at y... 
>   Sent: Friday, March 02, 2001 10:35 PM
>   Subject: [HPFGU-OTChatter] Tom Swifites
> 
> 
>   Hmm. Does this count?
> 
>   "The mirror in the Boy's dorm always seems sad," Harry reflected.
> 
> 
>   Morsus Crustum
>   It works for me. I am collecting all of the Tom Swifties onto one 
big list. When I get them all done, what do I do with it? Or where do 
I go to upload it or whatever?
>   Doreen
> 
> 
> 
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