Pout II, attractiveness and sexuality, JKR

[Tabouli]

David:

Tabouli wrote:
> "It's not FAIR!" 

...and gets a cascade of 'how awful my theatre experiences were' 
posts!  Poor Tabouli!

Here's a haiku to keep you going:

Excitable fans!
Hush as you leave the movie:
think of Tabouli<

(Tabouli sniffs, retracts her lower lip slightly, and accepts David's kindly handkerchief, briefly distracted from her woes by the haiku he has embroidered on it)

storm:
> JKR rated as attractive woman - well she doesn't do it for me ..
except as a writer. But then I like dark haired, olive skintoned
women (in balence for my bland mouse hair and pale skin I
suspect) and What is it about Lesbians that we all wear glasses?
I went to dinner the other night and of the 8 dykes around the
table 6 wore glasses ... Is it something we are doing ..... ?
(snickers slightly)<

Ahhh, another person with fine tastes (says the dark haired, olive skintoned Tabouli, who wears glasses on occasion, but has, alas, concluded that she is decidedly heterosexual).

I've always been fascinated by the way demographic/genetic factors can affect people's lives.  Hence my regular speculations on things like physical appearance, gender differences, sexuality, height and so on.  On the subject of sexuality, about five years ago, after much musing and worrying that generally finding more women attractive to look at than men meant I was bisexual repressed by some taint of latent homophobia, I concluded that I am sexually heterosexual (if that makes sense), emotionally very heterosexual, and aesthetically bi.

The aesthetic bit works like this.  I know that there's this idea that straight women look more at other women out of a desire to compare themselves with them and get ideas in terms of grooming and dress, but it's not just that for me.  I genuinely do like looking at women in an aesthetic sort of way, almost the way I'd admire a beautiful landscape or picture.  No doubt this has its sinister origins in society's objectification of women, but O well.  However, this really doesn't seem to be connected with sex.  My feelings on the subject are similar to those of gay men I know who put pictures of women on their walls and are always talking about women's attractiveness and dress sense, but have no sexual interest in them.

My reactions to men are quite different.  Unless spectacularly handsome (see teenage crush on Morten), I can't seem to view men on the simple aesthetic plane where I can view women.  If you ask me about the looks of Hollywood actors, I could waffle for hours on the relative merits of female actors, but would honestly struggle to find any of the male ones attractive, because for me attractiveness in men is a holistic thing.  I rarely ogle male strangers, and I am, in fact, suspicious of and put off by conventionally very handsome men, because this often seems to have negative implications for the character.  For example, ridiculous over-muscling shouts boring gym-head Meat Market Indexer in my ear.  I could indifferently agree that a man is "good-looking", but couldn't speak for his "attractiveness" at all unless I had further information about what inhabited the good-looking body, through conversation, body language, behaviour, etc.  If the inhabitant attracts me, *then* the aesthetic factor reasserts itself, and I can admire (with intent, even!).  If he doesn't, he can be as good-looking as he likes and I won't care.

Reactions to me suggest that I exude definite straight woman vibes.  I have straight female friends who often get checked out by lesbians, but not me.  My charms, such as they are, only ever attract men.  One of my friends came out around the time I was assessing my own position on the scale, but she told me that I did nothing for her whatsoever, though she did fancy my (straight) friends Meg and Caroline.  Huh!  I thought.  Even though I wouldn't have wanted to "do anything" for her, my vanity was still a bit miffed...

O yes, and as for JKR, she doesn't do it for me aesthetically either, though personally she does, very much.  That lovely wry humour of hers.  She feels like a good-hearted person to me.  I'd like to meet her, and fondly imagine we'd get on well (though my last attempt at meeting a favorite English author was a disaster.  Very uncomfortable and unfruitful).  I approve of  JKR's attitude to her characters, that is, she loves them all, even if in fictional terms they're nasty pieces of work.  I always get disconcerted when an author doesn't like some of her characters... it bothers me in the same way that actors disliking the person they're playing bothers me.  Which brings me to Gone with the Wind, which I'll put in a separate post...

Tabouli.


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