Oppression and MMI

[meboriqua at aol.com]

Okay, I have my fingers crossed that my online will not quit on me 
like it did three times in a row earlier.

Wow - I have so much to say.  About oppression and Ebony's post:  what 
almost every group has in common is the prejudices each group holds.  
Ebony is not alone in that she was brought up to believe so many 
stereotypes about different religions and races.  Many of my African 
American students believe some of the dumbest things I have ever heard 
about white people, Jews, Asians, etc.  OTOH, many Jewish people I 
know say outrageous things about African Americans.  It's a shame that 
racism is a common link.

What bothers me about oppressed groups being racist is that being 
oppressed is not the ultimate excuse to never succeed.  My students 
can come up with every example in the book of how they've been treated 
poorly because of their skin color, but that does not mean that 
So-and-so should never look for a legal job and sell drugs instead.  
Do not complain about what you will not try to change for yourself.

What bothers me about majorities being racist is that I cannot 
understand how people can be filled with so much hatred.  White men 
have it pretty damned good.  My boyfriend will always be Puerto Rican; 
he can't hide it.  It will always cause reactions from people no 
matter how successful he may be in years to come.  That sucks.  It 
makes me angry enough to want to scream because he is my boyfriend and 
I love him very much - how can the police, white people in the 
neighborhood, potential bosses, etc. judge him so harshly just by 
looking at him when he is such a good person?  Why do they think that 
he is lesser?  Why the hell do they care?  The same goes for my 
students.  I get such a kick out of the fact that my students are such 
tough kids (they really are) but because I know them so well, are such 
babies too.  What a shame others cannot see them the way I do - as 
funny, silly, sensitive, smart kids.

MMI - Ebony, I posted something very similar about body image a few 
months back.  I am caught between two worlds: the you-must-be-skinny 
world of my suburban Jewish family and the I-like-your-fat-ass world 
of my students and boyfriend, who are all either African American or 
Latino.  It's sometimes painful to be with my family because I want to 
scarf down three pieces of cake but they'll stare.  However, many of 
my students have health problems that are related to their diet and 
weight.  My boyfriend likes my curves, though, and that is very nice 
for me.  :-)

Let's face it - we live in a superficial society.  Weight and looks 
are very important.  I agree with Tabouli, though, that it is how we 
view ourselves that will make the difference.  If I want to be a 
trophy wife I know where to look to get a man (I've been there - I 
weighed about 100 pounds a few years ago).  Since I do not want a man 
who will treat me like an object, that is not what I have.  Raul and I 
stay up talking late into the night all the time.  I am more 
physically comfortable around him than any other person on the planet.  
The fact that he is handsome has nothing to do with who he wants as a 
mate.  In fact, things did not work with Raul until I took time for 
myself and found what I love to do and that being just me is the best 
thing of all.

--jenny from ravenclaw,