Crouch tactics. And Sexiness.

[lucky_kari <lucky_kari@yahoo.ca>]

--- In HPFGU-OTChatter at yahoogroups.com, "ssk7882 <skelkins at a...>"
<skelkins at a...> wrote:
> [Eileen -- Cindy has mentioned that you have been trying to reach
> me.  Just so you know, my email is out of service, and I can't
> access messages.  Outgoings have been erratic.  Just so you know
> I'm not ignoring you.]

[Yes, she told me that. When your email get backs to normal, you will
find three frantic reactions to the Crouch Trilogy Squared, plus an
accusatory note about certain nightmares you gave me.]

> Well, I certainly hope not!  ;->  And if so, I promise I won't choose 
> poor Eileen as my victim a second time (boy, talk about turning other 
> people into your mirrors!  Poor Eileen was just laboring under the 
> Imperius Curse all the way through that thing, wasn't she?).

Why am I reminded of this little gem?

********************************************************************
A somewhat submissive personality. I think that it gave him a secret
sick *thrill* to allow more dominant types to "force" him to do
Things No Decent Person Would Ever Do. I don't think that he fought
very hard against it at all. I think that he kinda liked it. 
********************************************************************

Must. Put. Up. A. Fight. 

> Really, though, I was trying to be considerate in posting them
> all at once like that.  Parts 1-7 were really one complete argument.
> I thought that it might be a bit unfair to Eileen to release them
> in dribs and drabs, causing her to start approaching parts of
> the argument before she had the coherent whole in front of her to 
> work from.  That, at any rate, would have been how I would have 
> preferred such a thing to be presented to me, had I been Eileen.  
> So I really was just trying to play fair.  

Oh I know. I did prefer having it all together. Really and truly. Made
my day. I've read the whole thing about twenty times now. Length has
never been an off-putter for me. I'm a big "War and Peace" person, and
I adore "Moby Dick." (I need to write a Melville TBAY scenario
eventually. Melville would have just loved TBAY.)

> And of course, you know that I was only willing to mistreat you 
> so horrifically because I absolutely adore you.  And because
> I *know* how much you enjoy that sort of thing. ;-)

This is just so *wrong* on many different levels. It's as if those
shadow selves had taken over. 
 
> I guess that, like most people, I do tend to assume that other 
> people's minds work the same way that mine does.  Often a foolish
> assumption, that, I know.  And a rather telling one, too, in light
> of part seven, eh?

Yes, very, very telling. 

> Chivalry and honour.  They're nice qualities, Eileen.
> 
> But, uh, look.  If in fact that *wasn't* chivalry?  If it was 
> just that, er, 'Comfort-Hurt' of yours?  
> 
> Please.  *Don't* tell me, okay?  Allow me to keep my illusions.  ;-)

Well, then, I won't. But have you given a thought to who I was
imitating with the constant hints?

And that's plain *wrong* as well. 

> Probably because I didn't find Barty Jr. sexy.  Edmund, on the other 
> hand?  Now, Edmund was *Dead* Sexy.

Agreed. I was such a good Edmund, btw. No-one else in the class had a
smidgeon of dramatic sense, and I was chewing the scenery royally.
Scared them out of their wits too with my resulting
over-identification with Edmund. I immersed myself in that role to the
point where I felt *hurt* when people said anything negative about
Edmund, and snapped at them.   

And the looks on everyone's faces when ever-so-bent Eileen pointed out
the undertones of Lear and Cordelia's relationship... 

> As for Crouch Sr...
> 
> Wendy:
> 
> > On my first reading, the image that came to my mind of Crouch was 
> > David Niven. Very straight, thin, impeccably groomed. Handsome, 
> > yes, perhaps. But I personally don't find that sort of look to be 
> > sexy. 
> 
> <quiet moan>
> 
> Oh, Wendy!  But I *do,* you see.  I *do!*
> 
> Oh, how could you do this to me?  It never even would have *occurred* 
> to me to envision Crouch as David Niven.  Gah!  Are you on my 
> therapist's *payroll* or something?

David Niven! Perfect! I had such a crush on David Niven playing
Phileas Fogg, the quintessential stiff-lipped English gentleman, when
I was about thirteen. 

> So cheer up about Elder Crouch, will you?  The man may indeed 
> have been a bit of a jack-booted fascist, but at least he's not 
> some sick and shameful stormtrooper fantasy.  You could have done
> worse in the Bent department.  A *lot* worse.  Trust me.

That's extremely comforting to hear. 
 
> > "I don't like Mrs. Crouch," says Eileen. 
> >
> > "It's envy," says Cindy.
> 
> Yup.  'He loved her as he had never loved me.'
>
> Have a mirror, Eileen.  And don't think too hard about the troubling
> implications.  *Any* of the troubling implications.  <g>

<a horrified look dawns on Eileen's face> 

Why oh why did my talent in life have to be this? 
 
> TWO canons?  *TWO?*
> 
> Uh-oh.
> 
> I've some idea what one of them might be, but I have absolutely no 
> idea what the other one is!  I look forward to finding out.

And now you're scaring me that I won't hit on the one you're thinking
of. Lovely.  

> Well, I certainly hope you take that nasty little TBAY!Elkins out
> to the woodshed!  'Cause she's had that coming for a looooong
> time now.  

Well, I'd best go and finish writing Post Six. 

Hoping that no-one ever goes through our TBAY posts and writes an
Elkins-style analysis of the subtext,

Eileen

P.S.  
Amy writes:
>I'm afraid I just can't envision kissing a man whose mind will be
>occupied with the worry that his mustache is getting mussed. 

You think so? I had thought... But no more.