Hogwarts Play: House of Tom Bombadil

[dfrankiswork at netscape.net]

The latest report from the Hogwarts play follows.  It seems Ms Skeeter objected to using a Little Owl - I understand its diet does not agree with her - and her mail was delayed.  The ostrich which eventually delivered the report appears unfortunately to have eaten part of it, and so again we are unable to report who is playing which part.

May I take this opportunity to reassure Madam Elkins that no permanent damage was done (a simple Reparo spell on the legs of my desk was all that was necessary; best wishes for a speedy recovery to the postman) and I look forward to reading her retrospective on the late Mr Crouch over Christmas.  In the meantime, we are considering installing a TBAY sign over the door for fear that otherwise some pronouncements from this office may not be treated with the lack of seriousness they deserve.

Your humble servants
Frankis & Stein
Infurn Alley

Scene: The house of Tom Bombadil.  Tom, Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin are sitting round the dinner table.  Frodo is looking bored.

Tom: ... Old Man Willow - he's very violent, beware of him, and mind the beasts in the Forest... the Barrows are out of bounds to anyone who does not wish to suffer a most painful death

Frodo puts on the ring and moves towards the door

Tom: Hey, where are you a-going, Frodo my lad?  Twinkly eyes don't need cloaks to be invisible.
Sam: Oi reckon he be off to follow the spiders.
Merry: Spiders? there are no spiders for another 500 pages! Honestly, doesn't anyone read anything around here?
Pippin: No, why should we, with you around to ruin the plot for us?
Tom: I think it is time for another song!

(the smiles of the hobbits become a little fixed)

Old Tom Bombadil is a barmy codger
Execrable his versing is, and hits you like a bludger
None has ever heard him out, although he sings them faster
Tom's songs are stranger songs, at tedium Tom is master

Ah, music!  A magic we all hope to be able to perform!

Curtain falls, as do the Hobbits, fast asleep.

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