[HPFGU-OTChatter] Re: Gay vs Straight Marriage - Yes or No Poll

[Amanda Geist]

I've only been following a very little bit of this, but here's my thought.

I can understand two gay people wishing to have a formal, established,
legally recognized union. It's very ostracizing to be told you *can't.* I
also understand that one reason gays want their unions to be legally
recognized, so that the same automatic actions happen should one of them
die: the remaining person is the beneficiary on the policies; he/she owns
the house, etc. As it stands, many legal instruments must be executed for
this to be true, while I, as my husband's wife, don't have to mess with it.

All of this is fine with me. What I don't like is two gay people who only
want their marriage recognized so they can get tax breaks filing jointly, or
to be able to "get" something. That sort of thing came into being to help
ease the burden of raising children, which most gay couples aren't doing.
Which is why they're well-dressed and speeding past me in their Hummers,
while I trundle along in my low-end Saturn with the handprints and stickers
all over the windows (DINK envy, sorry; and I know darn well it's not
confined to gay couples). The point is, I hear way too much "we should get
the same stuff hetero marriages get" without (in most cases) a commensurate
burden. If it's about *getting,* I think the intent is misplaced.

As for whether they're sinners or not? Surely that's between them and their
God, whoever or whatever that may be. Like abortion, which I am against but
do not think there should be a law about, this seems a personal thing. It is
not mine to judge. Nor, even if it were, *could* I, since I am firmly hetero
and have no way to identify with gay situations, feelings, and perceptions
enough for an informed judgement.

America is obsessed with sex, to the point where those who abstain are
looked at with awe or ridicule. My husband Jan loves this anecdote: if an
Italian priest were to reel home from a brothel, the folk would cluck their
tongues but say "it's human nature"; were he to reel home drunk, the folk
would be appalled. If an Irish priest were to reel home drunk, the folk
would cluck their tongues and say "tis human nature," and if he came home
from a brothel, they would be appalled. The point? To a great degree, the
sin is in the culture's perception of it as much as the act. I don't think
you get away from that until you're talking to God. If marriage had nothing
to do with sex, if it were a platonic legal relationship, nobody would be
batting an eye.

Anyway, for some reason I got the urge to throw that out for consideration.

~Amanda