Children and Careers (WAS moved from Main List: on not having children)

[Cindy C.]

Catlady:

> > Drifting even further from my topic, I believe in *both* 
> > genetics *and* environment, causing me to have opinions 
> > which will offend EVERYONE. On such opinion: Women who 
> > hand their children over to be raised by a nanny are 
> > putting their child in the environment of the 
> > intelligence, education, mode of speech, table manners, 
> > religious beliefs, political beliefs, of a person who 
> > chose that line of work either because she obsessively 
> > adores being with children, or because she CAN'T get anything 
> > that pays better. 
 
Elkins replied:

> It seems to me that even leaving aside the rather, 
>er...provocative? suggestion that smart women don't enjoy childcare 
>(because I imagine you'll hear quite enough about *that* one!), 

Heh, heh. 

Relax, Catlady.  I'm not gonna come after you or anything.  After 
all, women who stay home with their kids aren't clever enough to 
express their objections to this implication in an intelligent 
way.  :-D

::schnoogles Catlady::

Actually, I didn't even raise an eyebrow at this implication, and 
I'd say the reason is that it is quite common for folks to express 
that opinion to you if you choose to stay home.  Man, they will come 
*right* out with it at the slightest provocation, too -- "You're 
*wasting* your talents!*  You're not modeling appropriate behavior 
for your daughters!"

What can I say?  I went to law school with a very hard-charging 
group of women, and I can count seven of my friends off the top of 
my head who bailed out of the work force.  We all did it the same 
way, too.  A few years of enjoying a childless career.  Followed by 
a child or two or three.  Followed by less professional success due 
to the inability to put in the hours like before.  Followed by the 
realization that the money simply wasn't worth the *stress.*

Boy.  I gotta tell ya that I bought the whole "You can have it all" 
line.  I really thought that having kids was as simple as, well, 
having them, hiring the best nanny you could find, and getting back 
to work as soon as possible, preferably six weeks after birth.  Boy, 
was I wrong!  For me, it didn't work at all.  Emphasis on *For Me.*

Cindy -- happily at home