Part vampires

[joywitch_m_curmudgeon]

--- In HPFGU-OTChatter at yahoogroups.com, "davewitley" 
<dfrankiswork at n...> wrote:

> To help HPFGU members who may have doubts about their friends and 
> acquaintances, I quote the following extract from the Guidelines 
for 
> the Regulation of Non-wizarding Part-humans, Section 3, Annex G, 
> Appendix iii, Tab b:
> 
> "Full vampire:
> 
> Sucks human blood
> Has razor sharp fangs
> Flies bat-like
> Spreads hypnotic spell
> Only goes out at night
> Snarls at Dumbledore
> Can be killed by properly accredited Slayer with wooden stake


Hmmm.  I don't know any of those, I don't think!

 
> Half vampire
> 
> Expert in potions
> Is unsympathetic to dental problems
> Swoops around like an overgrown bat
> Sprays spit when angry
> Maintains a low light working environment
> Sneers at Longbottom
> Has aversion to foolish wand-waving

Snape!  Snape!  I knew it!

> Quarter vampire
> 
> Likes tomato juice
> Gets teeth stuck in toffee
> Is airsick
> Has BO problem
> Vacations in Britain
> Quails at McGonagall
> Will not touch sausages on cocktail sticks

Uh-oh.  These all apply to....well....me.

--Joywitch, nervously