Couplethink Rant (WAS: Shipping the Trio and the Twins)

[lord1912 <Lord1912@juno.com>]

--- In HPFGU-OTChatter at yahoogroups.com, "Haggridd 
<jkusalavagemd at y...>" <jkusalavagemd at y...> wrote:


> This issue is-- or was-- viewed differently by males and females.  
I 
> no longer hold the following opinion (two score years since have 
> taught me its artificiality) but at the time I believed it as 
Gospel, 
> and I was not alone among my (male) peers.  It is that the 
> relationship, or the love, isn't real unless there is sex.  The 
sex 
> somehow ratifies the validity of the relationship.  The (very 
> bizarre) reasoning went as follows:  any guy could be nice to a 
girl 
> and be have her be nice in return.  the friendship thus was simple 
> courtesy, and nothing special.  It was the sexual act that lifted 
the 
> relationship from the mundane and made it "real" somehow.  This 
> attitude was all tied up with the "double standard", with the 
notion 
> that the girl was "giving up" something, and with other obsolete 
ways 
> of thinking about the opposite gender, but when I read this post, 
it 
> made me wonder just how obsolete this attitude was.
> 
> Haggridd


Well, as a female who usually holds atypical attitudes, let me chime 
in.  I've always viewed it that one can have a sexual relationship, 
either *with* or *without* love, and that there's nothing 
intherently wrong with either type of relationship.  Each kind fills 
different kinds of needs.  And just so long as both partners 
understand the nature of the relationship from the very beginning, 
there is nothing "cheap" about the sex-without-love relationship.  
And there is not necessarily any double standard involved.

Indeed, I must admit that many years ago when I actually had a life 
{late 1970s}, that there were many times I would get sexually 
involved with someone I would never consider marrying!   For 
instance, if Lucius were a real person, I would most certainly shag 
his socks off, but I'd never bring the guy home to meet the family! 
 
Lady Tavington-Malfoy