[HPFGU-OTChatter] Re: Responses to [perceived] assaults... (hope it's a bit shorter this time *g*)

[Laura Ingalls Huntley]

Okay...this is mostly clarification ^_^.

> Meira:
> Oh, please don't patronize me.

I'm sorry, I wasn't being clear...I wasn't talking *at* you, in particular,
my "you" was intended to be general.  Really, you just happened to stumble
upon on of my pet peeves, my reaction wasn't a reply to you so much as a bit
of a rant.

> Me:
> They will get bored, and frustrated at the fact that they don't
> understand what you try to explain to them, and causing your kid to
> lose interest in your explanation is a sure way to make him not want
> to go to you for further explanations (like when my dad tried to
> explain something in math for me when I was 16. I was so bored, I
> kept nodding off, and I swore that I would never ask help from my dad
> again, even though he was an engineer, and I didn't know anyone who
> was better at math stuff than him, simply because he bored me with
> his explanations).

mmm...I don't know.  It's not really the same kind of unability to
understand.  A kid isn't really going to have a driving *need* to learn
about sex, the way you really *need* to learn math or you'll get a bad
grade.  If they *do* feel that strongly about learning about it, they
probably really need to know.  Anyway, bored with sex?  Seems like a good
attitude for children to have to *me* ^_~.

 > Laura:
> or society's assumption that homosexuality is not normal) and you see
> it as better that they continue to be subjected to it on the basis
> that they're happier that way and bad things have yet to happen?
> Isn't it a basic parental responsibility to keep their children from
> harm?
>
>
> Meira:
> It is a basic parental responsibility, yes. You say "A child is being
> subjected to something that is known to be harmful...or society's
> assumption that homosexuality is not normal". First of all, don't let
> John hear that *g*. Second, if to me homosexuality *is* a normal
> thing and I couldn't care less if my kid turned out to be gay (or
> lesbian), what would be wrong with that? (unless you are talking
> about kids getting raped here, in which case, I must remind you that
> rape has nothing to do with sexual tendencies.)

Okay.  You misunderstood me entirely here.  I was trying to say that
*society's assumption that homosexuality is not normal* was the harmful
thing.  Which it is.  What if a child has homosexual feelings and is never
told that it's okay?  I've *seen* people - even heterosexual ones - fret
themselves crazy about feelings that they don't understand, dreams about
sexual activity with a same-sex friend, etc.  Kids need to know that it
isn't shameful or wrong.  Unfortunately, our current culture will teach them
the opposite.

> Me:
> Nothing, but the way that John was speaking his mind made me think
> that his opinion of being straight is totally wrong. My idea of John
> is that he's "straightophobe", if such a thing exists.

I don't know John personally, but I severely doubt this.  For one thing, he
chooses to socialize in the HP fandom, which is mostly populated with
straight women.

> Me:
> There's a difference between thinking "But (male character) and
> (other male character) are simply *not* shippable, but I can see how
> (male character no. 3) and (male character no. 4) might work out" and
> between thinking "Any straight couple is wrong, everyone should be
> gay" and thinking "any gay character is wrong, everyone should be
> straight".
>

Obviously I cannot read Diane's mind, but from her posts, I understood that
she felt any same sex relationships in the Harry Potter world were not only
unfeasible, but the mere possibility of them would be detrimental to her
picture of the books.

> Me:
> Sexual exploration and experimentation shouldn't happen because of
> peer pressure. Nothing should happen because of peer pressure. Where > are
your brains when it comes to that? (refrains from using the
> old "if everyone will jump off a bridge will you jump off it as well"
> phrase)

No, the peer pressure is not strong enough to make anyone do anything, it's
just enough to nudge people out of their fear of considering homosexuality
as an option.  Like I said, I have yet to see anyone "jump off the bridge"
and engage in activity that they were not comfortable with.  It's just that
so many people come here conditioned to be afraid of being gay - afraid of
anyone even thinking they were gay.  It's not so much a pressure as
an...example.  Social powerful people here (i.e. non-first years) tend to be
very open about their sexual orientation.  Whether gay, bisexual, or
straight, they aren't ashamed, everyone respects them -- this shows people
who were priory too terrified of public opinion to even *look* at their own
feelings to realize that it's OK, and they won't be ostracized for anything.

Any pressure comes from the fact that impressionable firsties or followers
(this is a completely normal and acceptable social position, BTW...if we
were all leaders, things would get very confusing) want to *be* like these
people who everyone thinks is smart, funny, interesting, popular, etc.  And,
let's face it, most of them are bisexual.  A case in point, last year one of
my friends told me that he wished he was bisexual so that he would attract
more girls (it wasn't quite as offensive as it sounds, he was quite
obviously being facetious).  This year, however, he has apparently decided
that his *is* bisexual.  Is this a product of the attitude here that
"homosexuality and bisexuality are cool" or a personal discovery of his own?
I don't know.  Either way, he has yet to have a relationship with another
boy.

> Meira:
> Of course. Did you think I was against slash? I love slash...

It's just that you said you agreed with Diane, and Diane is against slash in
general.


> Laura:
> Okay.  She said slashy OR sex-filled.  So, she objects to all slash
> AND sex-filled het.
>
>
> Meira:
> AARRGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH.....
> (sorry)
> OR is *not* the same thing as AND.
>

I really don't see how you can read her statement (even without taking into
consideration all her other statements about slash) without getting the
information that she doesn't like slash in general and she doesn't like any
type of explicit sex scenes, even het ones.

mm..anyway, off to physics -- my study buddy is ready to kill me, I told him
I'd be down in the lounge about an hour ago.

Laura