[HPFGU-OTChatter] Self-Evaluation (was Re: Harry Haters...)

[Ladi lyndi]

--- naama wrote:
> I have to say that as a
> person who doesn't have 
> children, but who remembers her own childhood
> very well, the thought 
> of parents censoring their children's reading
> raises my hackles a 
> bit. I would have hated my parents to do that
> to me. I won't take an 
> oath on it, but I think that if I had children,
> I'd let them read 
> whatever fell into their hands. Children
> definitely need protection 
> in the real world, but I'd prefer to give
> children freedom in the 
> realm of imagination. Just my IMO (and I
> reserve the right to a 
> complete change of mind when and if I have a
> child. <g> )


Lynn:

May I respectfully say that you probably will
change your mind when you have a child. ;)  It's
a whole 'nuther universe at times and you'll be
amazed how your attitudes change when that little
bundle arrives.  Just ask any father of a
daughter who used to think it was great to play
doctor with the girl down the street and now
thinks all boys are scum and say their daughter
isn't allowed to date until she's 35!  LOL  

Censorship is not necessarily a bad thing though
it has that connotation.  It can be a very
responsible and necessary thing for a parent to
do.  A parent should know their child, the
maturity level, fears, etc.  Children can't
always differentiate between literal and
figurative and it can cause problems when they
aren't given guidance in exploring the realm of
imagination.  A parent may decide that something
would be more appropriate for when the child is
older or determine that some things must be done
with the parent.  For example, we let our
daughter watch PS whenever she wants but she's
not allowed to watch CoS unless Mommy or Daddy
watch it with her.  Why?  She has a huge fear of
spiders so we can skip over the spider scenes
until such time as we can help her get over her
fear of them.  Watching that spider grab Ron
won't exactly help us do that. 8) 

I believe it's very important that parents have a
good handle on what their children are reading,
watching, listening to, eating, etc. and to know
what is out there that can influence their
children.  Trash in, trash out.  Can parents know
about everything that affects their child?  No,
not in the world today, but as parents we do what
we can and establish the type of relationship
whereby our children know they can come talk to
us about things and we can influence how they
learn to make responsible choices for their
lives.  To say it's impossible to know everything
and so abdicate responsiblity for knowing
anything is, IMHO, irresponsible parenting. 
Again, IMHO, I think Amy's dad sounds like a very
responsible parent.  

--- Amy wrote:
> *They might have done so in subtler ways.  My
> mother claims that when 
> we were little, she hid "The Little Engine that
> Could" because she 
> hated it so and we wanted her to read it to us
> over and over again.  
> Not exactly a candidate for the "most banned
> books" list, but it 
> drove her nuts.

Amy, I think you may be right that there was
censorship going on in your home that you weren't
aware of.  I wouldn't be surprised if books that
were more adult in nature were higher on the
bookshelves where little hands didn't get a hold
of them.  Anyway, that's what we do in our house.
 LOL  As you grew taller, you were also older and
more mature to deal with those books.

As for "The Little Engine That Could", that
wasn't censorship, that was purely to save your
mother's sanity.  LOL  I love books, but after
reading something 1,000 times, you really need
the break.  I wouldn't be surprised if your mom
could have told you the story word for word
without the book in front of her.  We go through
that now with our daughter, particularly at
bedtime.  I've purposely packed up a couple of
books for our move just to give hubby and I a
month-long break from reading them.  LOL

Lynn

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