No One Calls Me Anymore . . .

[Cindy C.]

Wow!  Kathy can ignore a ringing telephone!  She must be made of
*granite!*  ;-)

For me, an unanswered phone is right up there with an alarm clock no
one will turn off.  Makes me homicidal, it does.

Elle wrote:

>It *really* 
> is annoying to just get your (mildly dyslexic) son settled down to 
> his dreaded "reading aloud" homework or just corral the kids for a 
> bath when the phone rings and it is
>*nobody-that-you-want-to-talk-to* (aka a telemarketer).  

Yeah.  Throw in children who are old enough to answer the phone, and
it is even worse.  

When the kids can answer, the phone rings, one of the kids answers
and, unable to tell the difference between a telemarketer and *real
person,* the child will retrieve me.  Even though the kids are trained
to ask "Who's calling?" they invariably forget the answer by the time
they find me, and all they can remember is that "Fed-something" is on
the phone.

Elle:


> I usually answer politely (inwardly seething as the caller butchers 
> the pronunciation of my name) 

Ha!  Yeah, that's a real give-a-way, huh?  "Could I speak to Mrs.
Urgen -- uh, Algernon -- mmm, Eldinon?"  

>and cut them off near the beginning of 
> their spiel with a "Thank you very much but we are not interested" 
> immediately followed by a hang-up.  Is that really rude do you 
> think?  

My method was to *immediately* start speaking as soon as I had smoked
them out as telemarketers, which took seconds.  To keep them off
guard, I always said this in a terribly cheerful voice:  "Oh, thanks
for thinking of me!  I wouldn't be interested, so please place me on
your Do Not Call List!  Bye!"  I would then immediately start the
phone moving from my ear to the cradle, regardless of the reaction.  

Works for charities, too!  The only telemarketers I ever felt sorry
for were those soliciting for firefighters/police officers,
particularly after 9/11.  So I'd throw in a "Thanks for all you do!"
just for them.  

Sandy wrote:

>Any live telemarketer who got me on the phone (especially before we
>got caller i.d.) was apt to hear "Go get a *real* job!" before I hung
>up. 

I don't want to put words in Sandy's mouth, but I suspect "Go get a
*real* job!" just meant something akin to "Can you please go make
widgets or do something -- anything -- that adds more value to society
than just bothering people who don't want to talk to you?"  That's how
I read it, anyway!  :-D

Cindy -- who once received a call at her place of business (stodgy law
firm) from someone soliciting for the police department, who agreed to
donate, and who was *very* alarmed a few days later when a police
officer in full uniform arrived to pick up the check and asked the
receptionist to find me