Freaks and Geeks

[Mary Ann]

Susan wrote:

And frankly, we get amazed comments "your children are SO polite", "I
can't believe how well-behaved your children are!" constantly..which
frankly worries me. My kids are just kids. What are other kids'
behavior like if our children's conduct elicits such amazement?

Mary Ann:

You go, girl. :)  I also get comments from complete stangers about my 
well-behaved and polite children, including the ASD 7-year-old who 
has the patience, frustration level and tact of a really annoyed 2-
year-old.  Seeing as we differ on language-around-children 
situations, and, based on observations of children in different 
situations, I believe that children who behave well in public do so 
because they know what is expected of them in different situations.  
I have a friend who has young children and swears regularly.  Her 
kids pick up her language BUT they NEVER use such language outside 
their own home; they know that people other than their immediate 
family members may be offended by such language and they respect 
that.  At my place of work it's not unusual for the football-playing 
boys (soccer to plebs ;) ) on the school playground to shout 
out "bloody hell, good shot!" or some such, realise that a staff 
member is within hearing range, and apologise.  We gently remind the 
boys to mind their language and then praise them highly for 
correcting themselves.  IMO the fact that the boys identify their 
improper behaviour and correct themselves without adult intervention 
is far more important than the occasional swear word they let loose.

Different parenting methods; same results.  This is one of the many 
reasons why little people fascinate me so, and why I love working 
with them. 

As for the behaviour of other children...aargh.  I work mostly with 
reception-year students (4 and 5 year olds) and some of these kids 
have had little or even no discipline before setting foot in school.  
The trick?  Firmness and consistency.  The kids soon learn not to 
mess with Mrs. Jennings, but these same kids who need the most 
disciplining often come up to me and give me hugs.  Go figure.

Mary Ann, another formidable little round mom, and a card-carrying 
member of Tabouli's Sinister Social Scientist Club