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Meredith Wilson wrote:
<blockquote TYPE=CITE><tt>My sister wanted to hyphenate, but it seems that
in Kentucky you have to take your husband's name.</tt></blockquote>
Wow. Wonder if that's still the case? We can choose in Texas, but I opted
to take my husband's name. I considered it a gift. He's the kind of man
who looks beyond the surface and into the underlying messages and meanings
of things (maddening during movies, by the way), and to him, "good name"
still has means just that, his family name and the connotations of personal
honor and integrity associated with it. What an honor, then, that he thought
enough of me to share that good name with me, that he believed I would
guard the honor and integrity of his name as well as he has.
<p>And to be honest, I like being someone's wife. Publicly. Someone I love
chose me! Forever! I want people to know. Damn straight I'll carry his
name, and go by "Mrs."; my pride in it equals his humility in offering
it. We both wear rings proclaiming that we are spoken for, taken, possessed,
etc. I got to do more.
<p>And no, all you people doubting my sanity or self-identity at this point,
I'm not an idiot. Today's realities are real, after all--I have my own
"credit identity" and all that. The point is that I hardly ever hear anyone
speaking about taking their husband's name as anything but an antiquated
imposition. I totally understand all the reasons a woman could want to
keep her own name, and I don't have a problem with that at all, but I wanted
to articulate an equally valid, positive way of looking at the tradition.
<p>By the way, I did what my mother did, what I thought everyone did, and
took my maiden name as my middle name--from Amanda Lee Peters to Amanda
Peters Lewanski. But Jan, un-Texan, had never heard of this convention.
Is it a regionalism? Honest, everyone I know of that took their husband's
name did this. I'm curious.
<p>--Amanda</html>