?berposting - Rita's latest scoop

[flying_ford_anglia]

Original Yahoo! HPFG Header:
No: HPFGUIDX C6189
From: flying_ford_anglia
Subject: Re: 'berposting - Rita's latest scoop
Reply To: [Yahoo! #6095] determined now to crack into the Posting
Date: 8/8/00 1:21 am  (ET)

Dee commented:

<<elite....

sighs. Now, look what you've done! You've created a monster!!! They all
want to be Neil!>>

***

Help! I don't want to be Neil any more!

***
A CAR TOO FAR?

Rita Skeeter saw her chance and buzzed over to the exhausted 'berposter,
who was slumped in a button-backed armchair:

"So! How does it feel to have posted 500+ messages in just over two
months?" she said, throatily, reaching in to her capacious handbag for
a sheet of parchment and the Quick-Quotes Quill.

"It feels like... I dunno. It's a bit embarrassing really. I just sort
of said what came into my head and, suddenly, I look like a friendless
nerd who spends all his time posting messages about Harry Potter and
treacle..."

The quill sprang into action:

"Flying_Ford_Anglia has spared no feelings in his meteoric rise to the
top of the Harry Potter for Grown Ups posting league,", it scratched,
in lurid green ink. "He uses vicious asides and diatribes to belittle
anyone in his path..."

"Er. 'Scuse me. I... that's not what I said!!"

"Don't worry dear," said Rita, raising a heavily-pencilled eyebrow,
"I'll edit later. So, you were saying?"

"I dunno why people would aspire to have the *most* posts. Um... surely
quality is more important than quantity?"

"The infamous megawaffler feels that he is in an unassailable position,"
continued the quill, "but as one of his close clubfellows commented:
'Oh yeah - that smug Brit? Thinks he knows it all, but his days are
numbered.'"

"So, DEAR readers. Is this the end for Mr High and Mighty Ford
Anglia? Watch this space alone for the exclusive dish!"

Rita shuffled the paper and pen into her handbag and with a slight smirk
on her ruby red lips, snaked towards the door. "Thanks ever so!" she
breathed, over a fur-clad shoulder, as she exited.

Flying_Ford_Anglia grimaced and sat staring out of the open window. It
was no fun at the top, he decided.