Sirius/Lupin, GoF Dursleys

[Zarleycat at aol.com]

No: HPFGUIDX 17289

--- In HPforGrownups at y..., hfakhro at n... wrote:
> Morag wrote:
> I suppose so.  I think Harry does appreciate Lupin, but Sirius is 
> just the kind of not-too-demanding, glamourous, cool, father-figure 
Harry  wants just  now.  A father-figure who was able to be around 
more of the time  might be a 
> bit much to cope with all of a sudden.  I know he wants to go and 
> live with 
> Sirius, but he is not devastated when he can't.  Sirius is also the 
> anti-Vernon - he's a wizard, owns (or owned - what happened to it?) 
a > flying  motorbike, has long hair and is on the wrong side of the 
law.  Perfect.  I  think Lupin's a little too old-looking and acting 
(though he and  Sirius must be of an age) and a little too tired and 
sad for the role.  Finally,  Sirius  was the closest to Harry's real 
father. He has seen them in the same photo, Sirius  was  his father's 
best man and is Harry's own godfather.  Sirius tells  Harry he 
 would have died for James and Lily, thus linking himself with the 
one  thing  Harry has always known about his parents - they're dead.  
It's as  close as  Harry can get to having his own father back.
> 
> 
> All these why Sirius/not Lupin points have been very enlightening 
and 
> I agree with all the excellent points you made here. However, I 
think 
> there's one more thing that should be taken into account - I have 
the 
> feeling that Lupin sort of pushes Harry away at the end of Prisoner 
> of Azkaban, and Harry is not the sort to aggressively pursue a 
> relationship (IMO) especially with an adult. And I get the 
impression 
> that Harry does try to get close to Lupin running up to his office 
> when he finds out that Lupin is leaving, he says, 
> 
> "You're the best Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher we've ever 
> had!" said Harry. "Don't go."
> Lupin shook his head and didn't speak. He carried on emptying his 
> drawers.  <snip>"
> 
> Harry had the impression that Lupin wanted to leave as quickly as 
> possible. (POA)
> 
> In addition, we must remember that Lupin never told Harry he was a 
> friend of James until it came out by accident I think during the 
help  with the dementor/boggart scene. It happens when Harry says he 
heard  James and Lupin is overcome with emotion, but I get the 
feeling he  may not have told him that he knew James otherwise - it 
seems to be a painful subject. We do see Harry reaching out to Lupin 
at the end of  the book, but there's something (maybe the werewolf 
thing, but maybe  something we will find out later) that is holding 
Lupin back from  embracing Harry as a father figure. Sirius on the 
other hand,  actively reaches out to Harry, first by inviting him to 
live with him  in the Shrieking Shack and then by keeping in touch 
with him, whereas  Lupin dismisses him with a "I'm sure we'll meet 
again, Harry" - and I 
> think many of us can agree that it is not in Harry's nature to push 
> for adult relationships.
> 
snip

What a clear assessment of the Harry/Lupin relationship.  I'd add one 
more facet to this whole thread.  Harry and Remus have a student-
teacher relationship, although with friendly overtones, that is 
allowed to build over time. Remus is hesitant to reveal to Harry that 
he was a friend of both James and Sirius.  It's all very cautious.

Harry's relationship with Sirius is much more emotional from the 
start, and, once they meet, is compressed into one evening.  Even 
though they don't meet until late in the book, Sirius' presence 
overhangs Harry. He's a killer, he's after Harry, he slashes the Fat 
Lady, etc. And once Harry and Sirius finally do meet, the entire 
scene is charged with emotion.  Harry is enraged almost to the point 
of murder; then he's incredulous that a teacher he trusted would be 
friends with this murderer. In order to make Harry believe his story, 
Sirius has to speak from the heart and describe to Harry how his plan 
to switch Secret Keepers ultimately led to the Potters' murder, in 
essence taking the blame for their deaths.

Once all the explanations are made and Harry finally believes Sirius' 
story, he can only nod because he's too overcome to give voice to his 
thoughts.  Then follows the few minutes of elation in the tunnel 
where Harry thinks he won't have to go live with the Dursleys, the 
Dementor scene, and Sirius' escape.  Perhaps Harry has a certain 
level of trust in Sirius that he doesn't have with other adults 
because circumstances have forced the two of them to deal with each 
other through honest, if sometimes painful, emotions.  

Marianne