Amanda's finally lost it

[rainy_lilac at yahoo.com]

No: HPFGUIDX 23550

--- In HPforGrownups at y..., "Angela Burgess" <MmeBurgess at m...> wrote:
> --- In HPforGrownups at y..., Amanda Lewanski <editor at t...> wrote:
> > I think the policies of this list are just great. Anyone who has 
> never (a) taught a class in any form, (b) done a presentation, (c) 
> been married, or (d) had children will not appreciate how hard it 
is 
> to keep a civil tone sometimes. The image of a snowball down a hill 
> comes to mind; things just get out of hand. <
> 
> Amanda, I agree completely.  It is so hard when not talking face to 
> face to get points across completely as you mean them.  We as a 
> society are so used to reading body language, facial signs, etc. in 
> addition to listening to what people say that it is hard to grasp 
> what someone means when we don't have those non-verbal clues.  As a 
> result, postings that were meant light-heartedly or even as a jest 
> get taken too seriously and, before you know it, we have an 
avalanche 
> on our hands! 


I have taken part in many, many online forums of various kinds and 
have seen way too many die a slow and horrible death precisely 
because no one was willing to step in witn a reasonable amount of 
moderating skill.

Social skills are important everywhere, but especially on the web 
where things are are much more easyily misconstrued, and where, for 
example, one person's "personal experience" with a religious group 
will sound like a judgement and a label by someone else. Going out of 
your way to think about ***how your words will sound to others***, to 
give others the benfit of the doubt, and maybe take into account that 
sometimes your opinion *isn't* the most important thing on the table 
at any given moment, are all efforts that pay off abundantly in the 
good will they create and the trust that they build.

I love this group, and I want to protect what it stands for and ehat 
it is doing. I think the moderators have been doing a superb job at 
knowing when to step in and act and when to step to the side. I 
applaud all of them.

As far as rules go, baby y'all have seen nothing. You want to see 
rules? Go to the Jane Austen site at http://www.pemberley.com and 
just TRY to ask for help on your homework. It is a superlative site, 
run by dedicated (fanatical?) people. Much like ours! Long may we all 
live!

Off my soapbox,

Suzanne