The Dursleys and the Potters [and mostly the Malfoys]

[Rita Winston]

No: HPFGUIDX 11671

--- In HPforGrownups at y..., naama_gat at h... wrote:
> What I found particularly interesting is that both Petunia and 
> Vernon are extremely devoted parents. They really really care 
> about Dudley. In this sense they are very different from the
> Malfoys, who are very cold and uncaring towards their own son. 

When I first read SS, I was surprised that such evil people as 
the Dursleys, Vernon and Petunia, could be so loving and 
supportive to their spouses, each other. Of course, spoiling their 
biological child and abuse-neglecting their stepchild is a fairy tale 
cliche.

Vernon and Petunia dote on Dudley and coddle him to a point far 
beyond spoiled. People on this list have mentioned that the way they 
treat Dudley is itself a form of abuse, and it would actually be 
kinder to him if they had instilled a LITTLE bit of discipline in 
him. I am sure that it is not their INTENTION to abuse him!  

We don't know that the Lucius and Narcissa aren't just as devoted to 
their son, just more self-controlled about showing their feelings. 
I'm not arguing against 'cold', just maybe against 'uncaring': 
perhaps they force themselves to act cold to him 'for his own good'. 
Maybe they are making the opposite child-rearing error from the 
Dursleys. (Or maybe they're RIGHT, maybe putting him in a situation in 
which he learns to conceal his feelings, lie, manipulate people, 
be sarcastic (all the things we love fanon Draco for) IS the best
gift that can be given to the future adult that the child will 
become.)  

Lucius chewed Draco out fairly nastily in the Dark Magic shop at 
beginning of CoS but was that typical of his treatment of Draco? 
Right around that time, perhaps on the same shopping trip, Lucius 
bught Nimbus 2001 broomsticks for the whole Slytherin Quidditch team. 
 
There's room for all kinds of arguments about why Lucius bought the 
whole team Nimbus 2001s -- was it a bribe to put Draco on the team or 
would Draco have been on the team anyway (he must be a good Seeker, 
in PoA Harry beat him ONLY because of having a better broomstick)? 

Whether it was a bribe to put Draco on the team or simply a gift to 
the team that his son was already on, did he do it to please his son 
(who wanted to be on the team and wanted the team to be victorious) 
or to please himself (by having a son on a winning team, by defeating 
the Potter child)? 

When Draco said his father wanted to send him to Durmstrang but his 
mother didn't want him to go so far from home, was that even true? It 
might have been something Lucius and Narcissa had coached Draco to 
say in order to make nice to Karkaroff or some other motive. If true, 
does it indicate that his mother feels much more attached to him than 
she showed in public -- which I imagine a 14 yo boy would have HATED, 
to have his MOTHER treating him like a BABY in public. Does it 
indicate that his father wanted to give the beloved son the 'best' 
education, or simply that his father wanted to use him for some scheme 
involving Durmstrang?