Poster's Hall of Fame/Magic Carpets

[Steve Vander Ark]

No: HPFGUIDX 11833


> According to the Harry Potter series, magic carpets are illegal in 
England.  
> I'd like not only the quote (it's by Fudge and somewhere around the 
> beginning of GoF, but I can't find it!), but also the 
rationalization of why 
> this may indeed be the case.  Aladdin, anyone?

Crouch Sr. says: "Ali Bashir's on the warpath.  He wants a word with 
you about your embargo on flying carpets."

Arthur says: "I sent him an owl about that just last week.  If I've 
told him once I've told him a hundred times:  Carpets are defined as 
a Muggle Artifact by the Registry of Proscribed Charmable Objects, 
but will he listen?"

Crouch says: "Ali thinks there's a niche in the market for a family 
vehicle. I remember my grandfather had an Axminster that could seat 
twelve — but that was before carpets were banned, of course."

Later, Ali is caught smuggling in a consignment of carpets. I always 
kind of figured that a flying carpet would be harder to hide against 
the sky, since it presents a larger sillouette (sp.). Also, flying 
brooms AREN'T Muggle objects. They are completely magical in 
construction and nature. As someone pointed out, the tails aren't 
even made of broomstraw, they're entirely constructed as magical 
transportation. Okay, so coulnd't they do the same with carpets? 
Probably, but they apparently don't, they just enchant Muggle 
carpets, which makes All The Difference.


Conjectured timeline of carpet and broomstick avionics

Sylviana the Sleek gets the cool idea of making her regular old 
Muggle broom fly as a way to get to Diagon Alley in a hurry one 
Friday morning when she ran out of dragon spleen. She finds the ride 
curiously enjoyable.

Flying brooms catch on in a big way amongst Witches; Wizards refuse 
to try them because, well, it just looks like it would hurt.

Muggles all over the world start to get suspicious as more and more 
witches are flying all over the countyside, sometimes with no 
particular place to go; broom accidents are more and more common 
since the enchanted Muggle brooms offer no protection for the rider 
in the case of collision or just losing one's grip in a moment of 
particular enjoyment.

Wizards are beginning to get jealous of their womenfolk, but there's 
no way they're going to ride one of those things--ouch!--so Bubba 
Bathless, in the midst of a late-night gripe session with his closest 
mead-drinking buddies, hits upon the idea of making the carpet they 
happened to be almost passed out on fly, which means he can recline 
and drink mulled mead while he travels around. He can also do so with 
his friends. This idea is embraced wholeheartedly by the Wizards and 
disdained by Witches, who find brooms so much more, I don't know, 
gratifying.

Flying carpets become even more popular than brooms, and huge parties 
are held in midair as Wizards discover that when they congregate on a 
huge carpet they can 1) carry munchies and mead in vast quantities, 
2) hide the fact that there are a bunch of Witches of Ill Repute 
aboard, and 3) hide the whole thing from their wives.

Witches, who are inventive and innovative, create better and better 
brooms. Wizards, who are just having a great time so leave well 
enough alone, confine their innovations to constructing larger mead 
coolers, adding fluffier cushions, and using fabric that is easier to 
get the unidentified stains out of so the wife doesn't ask too many 
questions. 

Magic flying brooms begin to replace the old enchanted Muggle kind; 
these are specially constructed with charms to keep flyers on them 
just so, and Muggle repelling charms that make Muggles just think 
they see a particularly large goose flying by. Many jokes crop up 
about so-and-so's wife being a goose. These jokes are told mostly on 
flying carpets amongst Wizards and their "guests." Muggles meanwhile 
are reporting stange things falling from the sky, including empty 
bottels and women's underwear in unlikely colorws such as emerald 
green and peacock blue. 

Something must be done. When Agnes Granitebiter becomes Minister of 
Magic, she takes stern action. She sets up a commission to oversee 
the development of brooms that can be safely ridden by all witches 
and wizards and bans the enchantment of Muggle brooms and carpets 
entirely. Especially carpets.

Magical brooms become the standard form of personal transport in the 
Wizarding World. Many fond, wistful stories are told of carpets 
we "used to have" and the wonderful, wholesome adventures of long 
ago. Great-great-Grandma witches still snort into their elderflower 
wine when these stories are told. Great-great-grandpa wizards still 
get a strange light in their eyes and perk up suddenly when these 
stories are told.

Carpets are still enchanted secretly over the years and for 
sufficient Galleons, one can still get invited to an illicit "Carpet 
Party" over London. The word on the street is "Check with Crabbe" if 
you want in on the deal. 

Steve Vander Ark
The Harry Potter Lexicon
which does have a page about broomsticks, naturally
http://www.i2k.com/~svderark/lexicon