Wizard Paradise (a filk)

[Rosemary]

No: HPFGUIDX 8744


		WIZARD PARADISE (to the tune of Gangsta Paradise) a filk by Pippin 
			*with apologies to Coolio and Weird Al*

        As I'm tied to this tombstone in the  shadow of death
        I take a look at my life and realize there's not much left
        coz my scar's been achin' and freakin' so long, that
        the Daily Prophet  thinks that my mind is gone
        but I ain't never cursed a Muggle that didn't deserve it
        Dis my mum and dad,  you know that's unheard of
        I really hate to brag but I gotta, folk
        As it glows I see  my people in the wand smoke, fool
        Cedric, Frank and Bertha, James and Lily too 
        They surrounded Voldie and they told me what to do
        So I accio'd that portkey and I dodged that nasty curse
        And I made it back to Hogwarts, but Cedric needs a hearse

        Innocence is sacrificed, livin in a Wizard paradise
        Me an' Voldie don't make nice, livin in a Wizard paradise
        Dementors put your soul on ice, livin in a Wizard paradise
        People keep on losin'  lives,  livin in a Wizard paradise


        Herbology on Monday, Astronomy at night
        I can't live a normal life, I was raised in so much strife
        so I gotta play Quidditch with the Gryffindor team
        the Mirror of Erised got me chasing dreams
        I'm an educated kid with galleons to fry
        got my wand in my hand and Firebolt to fly
        I'm a halfblood Parselmouth  Dumbledore defender 
        Warner Brothers gotta be my merchandise vendor, fool
        Death ain't nothing but a chapter  away,
        I'm casting spells, do or die, what can I say
        I'm 14 now, but will I live to see 18
        Coz Voldie's out to get me and Snape is really mean.

        Chorus:
        
        Got a werewolf for Defense, got a ghost for History
        We'll go to any lengths, to solve a mystery
        Wish we could spend our  lives, living in the Wizard paradise
        Wish we could spend our  lives, living in the Wizard paradise
        
                 
        Minute after minute, hour after hour 
        Potions in the Dungeon, Homework in the tower 
        Everybody's running, Filch and Snape are  lookin'
        House Elves in  the kitchen, only Winky knows what's cookin'
        They say I gotta learn, they say they're gonna to teach me
        If I can't understand it, then You Know Who will reach me
        I win the points,  I win the Cup 
        I get the gold, that's why you  know my life's an open book, fool


        No phones no fax no VCR
        No eckeltricity,
        House elves do all the chores
        Really ticks Hermione
        Dumbledore gives me advice, living in the Wizard paradise
        Wish I could spend my life, living in the Wizard paradise