[HPforGrownups] If You'd Just Let Me Explain (filk)
Allyson
allyson at ptd.net
Tue Jan 23 22:22:36 UTC 2001
No: HPFGUIDX 10350
This was the best!!!! I loved it!!!!!!!!
----- Original Message -----
From: foxmoth at qnet.com
To: HPforGrownups at egroups.com
Sent: Tuesday, January 23, 2001 4:07 PM
Subject: [HPforGrownups] If You'd Just Let Me Explain (filk)
If You'd Just Let Me Explain...
[a filk by Pippin, to the tune of "If I Only Had a Brain" from The
Wizard of OZ]
Scene: The Shrieking Shack
Present: Harry, Hermione, Ron, Scabbers, Lupin, Black, Snape and
Crookshanks
(SIRIUS)
I was not the secret keeper, I pawned it off on Peter
For which I am to blame
I thought he could be trusted but instead he got me busted
If you'd just let me explain.
I admit I am compulsive, obsessive and impulsive,
And diagnosed insane
Though you think I'm a bad guy, I am innocent, not that guy
If you'd just let me explain.
Oh I, can tell you why, I broke Ron's leg in two
and cut up his curtains with a knife, I only wanted
Pettigrew
I would not be just a nothin', a fugitive stud muffin,
My heart all full of pain.
Life would be a ding a derry, I'd be taking care of Harry
If you'd just let me explain.
(LUPIN)
Oh, I couldn't be a lone wolf
A go-it-on-your-own wolf
My sanity to preserve.
Led my friends to animagic
Risking outcomes worse than tragic
Guess we had a lot of nerve.
I'm afraid there's no denyin' to Dumble I've been lyin'
My job I don't deserve
But I could have told the truth, all about my misspent youth,
If I'd only had the nerve
(SIRIUS and LUPIN)
So we implore you, Snape,
Don't let this dirty rat escape
He's Peter Pettigrew
Don't let him flee to You Know Who
(SNAPE)
When Neville in fine fettle, destroys another kettle,
I just tear him apart.
You'd be over-presumin' that I could be kind-a human
If I only had a heart.
If I'm tender or I'm gentle- they 'll think that I've gone mental
It's better not to start
It's The Kiss for Black and Lupin
'Cause these children they've been dupin'
I don't buy their crazy story
(SIRIUS )
And you're dyin' for some glory
(LUPIN)
And a Merlin decoration to deserve
(SIRIUS) Then I won't get to explain...
(HARRY)And I'll never get a home...
(HERMIONE) If he only had a heart...
(SIRIUS) A brain...
(SNAPE) What nerve!
(Hermione, Harry and Ron disarm Snape and knock him out)
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