[HPforGrownups] ADMIN: Comments on 'over-analysis' (was Re: JKR's play on words etc...)

Sun Mar 4 17:00:00 UTC 2001

No: HPFGUIDX 13546

Ah yes, I can picture it now...  Professor Neil, dressed in his night
robe,bunny slippers, and hairnet with his reading material clutched in his
hand and his reading glasses sliding halfway down his nose....He comes to
the door of his living quarters to answer the frantic knocking by the
troubled students....

Professor Neil:  "What's all this about then?"

Student named Malodorous Brat:  "Sir, Hermione is trying to summon up that
irritating rhino into the Gryffindor hallway, again!"

Hermione: "It's not that way at all Sir!  He keeps telling me that I'm
reading too much into this storyline again!  And I said if you don't stop it
this instant, I'll be forced to put that Rhino into your subconscious mind
again.  And he said.."

Professor Neil: "Enough !  Enough, I said!!  Hermione, if I've told you
once, I've told you a thousand times, it's not polite to force large animals
into the subconscious minds of the first year students!  They wake up
screaming and wailing, and disturbing the entire House with their antics!"

Hermione:  "But you don't really believe that the words on the printed page
represent everything that's in the mind of "She Who Must Not Be Named" when
she writes this stuff!  Do you?  I mean I get such limited material to work
with here...Harry and Ron get to say and do all the fun stuff!  I'm the one
who always has to be practical.  I always have to play fair, and I have to
be the bad guy every time one of them starts to get into trouble.  I feel
like calling my agent every time I see one of those scenes in the script.
But JK...I mean "She Who Must Not Be Named" always talks me into doing it
again and again.  I swear I'll be in therapy for the rest of my life trying
to work through these repressed feelings.  I see myself as the true star of
the books.  After all, I am the smartest character in the whole series...If
it weren't for all of those boy action scenes, I'd be getting top billing.
"Hermione Granger and the Lesser Beings battle the Evil Ones"... that's what
they ought to call the next book.  But noooo..."

Professor Neil: " That's quite enough young lady!  We all have our place in
the storyline.  If you keep talking this way, you'll upset Ron and Harry,
and then how are we supposed to resolve all the love relationships that will
happen in the future. After all, fans like Penny have donated thousands of
galleons to the H/H ship fund, and JK..I mean "She Who Must Not Be Named"
has to wait for the final negotiations to be completed before awarding you
to the winner!"

Hermione: "Paaleeease stop that nonsense, would you?  Why would I be
interested in Harry or Ron, when it should be obvious to everyone that I can
create my own Brad Pitt and Fabio lookalikes to satisfy my every desire just
like every other mature witch can!  Harry's been alternating between his
Brittany Spears and Claudia Schiffer clones for months now.  Ron, of course
has Super Model Orgies every night.  I guess that's just the result of
growing up in a large family... What I'm trying to say here is that the fans
have got to stop assuming that we are only what our storyline allows us to
be!  Those silly stories that the fans write are so limiting!  I can act
better than that for goodness sake.  But what I really want to do is
direct..."

Professor Neil: " Well, I have heard about all I can stand for one night.
Put the Rhino back into the abstract closet and go back to your evening
studies.  Let the fans have their fantasies, and be thankful that "She Who
Must Not Be Named" doesn't just write for kids!  We all have to do our jobs
and read the lines, and go about our lives."

Professor Randy pokes his head out of the next door down the hall. "What's
all the racket, Neil?"

Professor Neil: "Just the same old Rhino thing!"

Professor Randy: "Well you know sometimes a Rhino is just a Rhino.  And
sometimes a cigar is just a cigar!  But a popular book series can be all
things to all people!"

Professor Neil: "Now don't you start with your crude remarks again!  We all
know how you got the name Randy after all!  I'll never understand how
Dumbledore allowed you to teach Magical Practical Jokes for Fun and Profit!
We should be teaching the classics!  Not all this common trade school fluff
for the working class!  But you did pull off one of the all time best with
that 2000 election in the United States...The way you kept changing the vote
count in Florida was hilarious!  I've never seen Dan Rather look so
embarrassed in all my life!  Too bad they ended up with that Bush
character!"

Professor Randy: " You're missing the whole point, my good man!  I really
did like Al Gore.  But without Bush in the White House, the world would
become too well ordered, and where would the fun be in that?  I plan to keep
scaring the American public with the Dick Cheney near death experiences.
Nobody is more scared that George W. about the prospect of losing the leader
of the free world.  George has no interest in listening to his Dad's friends
debate over who George should replace Dick with."

Professor Neil;  " You are truly cruel!  But I must admit that the world
would be boring without all of those Magical Practical Jokes controlling the
events of the day!  That trick you played on Ronald Reagan's memory was a
bit much.  But he did say he did not want to recall the events of
Iran-Contra in all honesty."

Professor Randy:  "I do regret that one a bit.  But keeping the Muggle World
free from the sheer boredom of logical thought controlling world affairs is
a burden that I must bear."

Professor Neil:  " Hermione back to your room.  Malodorous, get back to your
studies.  Randy, I've got to get back to my reading.  Tell Carole I loved
her seminar on Controlling the Earth's Crust Movement through Magical
Methods".

Professor Randy:  " I'll tell her tomorrow when she calls.  She and Penny
get back from Paris next week.  I kind of worry about Sirius being escort,
but I've got to trust her."

Professor Neil:  "Don't worry about it.  I spoke to Sirius about them, and
he assured me that he's not going to get involved with another threesome
like he did last time!"

Professor Randy:  " Well that's good to hear!  Goodnight Neil."

Professor Neil:  "Goodnight"

(Wow.  I have no idea where all that came from.  It all started with those
bunny slippers.)

Time to sign off.  Randy goes back to his spellwork to cause George W. to
make more gaffs in his latest speech before the public.  ;0)

Randy

----- Original Message -----
From: "Neil Ward" <neilward at dircon.co.uk>
To: <HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com>
Sent: Sunday, March 04, 2001 2:53 AM
Subject: [HPforGrownups] ADMIN: Comments on 'over-analysis' (was Re: JKR's
play on words etc...)

> Crustum the Clown wrote:
>
> <<And then there's my therory....you all read *way* too much into half of
> this stuff.>>
>
> Scott responded:
>
> <<--But thats what this list if for isn't it? I mean sure we probably
"read
> *way* too much" into the books, but I for one think it's fun!  Not to make
> you mad or anything but that is the whole point of  literary discussion.
> (Kinda like that rhinoceros reference that
>  supposedly had something to do with Ionesco...)>>
>
> Jen said:
>
> <<Oh PLEASE, let's not talk about that one again.  I was the one who
brought
> up the rhino-allusion originally, and let me just tell you, I got very
sick
> of the "you're reading WAY too much into this - it's just ridiculous"
> posts/emails that just seeing a reference to it raises my blood
pressure.>>
>
>
> Yes, let's leave the scab over that wound, shall we?
>
> Jen is referring to an old thread that ended up causing some bad feeling
on
> the list.  So, in case anyone else was planning to comment on whether or
not
> some of us 'over-analyse' the Harry Potter books, I'll say, quite firmly,
> don't even go there!  It may start off in good humour, but we could easily
> end up with elevated blood pressure all round.
>
> Thanks, everyone.
>
> (Yes, I am wearing the moderator hairnet... and bunny slippers.  Wanna
make
> something of it?)
>
> Neil
>
> _____________________________________
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> Flying-Ford-Anglia
> Mechanimagus Moderator (revving up)
>
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> was rising gently into the air, his fist held high, a glint
> of gold in his hand." ["The Quidditch World Cup", GoF]
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