Another Avada Kedavra Filk

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 14508

Avada Kedavra

Not to be confused with Pippin's recent A.K. filk to Hakuna Matata

(To the tune of Macarena – but more immediately inspired by 
Macademia, from the Animaniacs Episode #92)

(An MTV Studio. Enter LORD VOLDEMORT, WORMTAIL, LUCIUS AND DRACO 
MALFOY. One of the Death-Eaters  - we name no names - suggested to 
VOLDEMORT that a dance video might be an effective fund-raiser in his 
upcoming battle against the Hogwarts and the Ministry)

VOLDEMORT (casting a Kedavra spell on one of the technicians), OK, so 
I am trying to reduce you (high, cold laughter)

VOLDEMORT (music)
It's just a simple curse, the Avada Kedavra
A little thing I do to stop people when they bother ya

WORMTAIL, LUCIUS & DRACO
It's dramatic!
So emphatic!
Each time we use it we feel ecstatic!

VOLDEMORT
So if you bug me, or even come near me
You will get the green light, do you hear me? 

WORMTAIL, LUCIUS & DRACO
Voldy's favorite spell is the Avada Kedav-er-a
That's the hex he used he finish off his father-a
Next on his list is that gringo Harry Potter-a

ALL
Avada Kedavra! Uh!

VOLDEMORT
I first learned to use it while I was still Tom Rid-da-la
They always told me that to use it's unforgi-va-ba

WORMTAIL, LUCIUS & DRACO
Ex ungue leonem*, he's no bleeding heart li-be-ra

ALL
Avada Kedavra! Uh!

VOLDEMORT
Now, please don't mention what happened
When I was dueling with Potter
I would have had him

ALL
How we hate him
That darn Priori Incantatem!

VOLDEMORT (spoken) 
Now come on, how was I to expect that?
A feather from the *same* phoenix in *both* wands? (High, cold 
laughter)

VOLDEMORT AND WORMTAIL (music)
For the last 13 years I've/he's been stuck in deep Albania
I've/He's risen from the tomb like that Count from Transylvania
Now at long last I/he can indulge my/his meglomania

ALL
My/his meglomania! Uh!

VOLDEMORT & LUCIUS
The next thing we'll do is reforge some old alliances
With Dementors and giants who are into the Dark Sciences
Our casus belli** will show them what defiance is
With Dark Arts appliances! Yes!

VOLDEMORT
Me llama el wizard whose moniker is Voldemort
But you can just call me the names you've often used before

WORMTAIL, LUCIUS & DRACO
The Dark Lord
or You-Know-Who
He-Who's-Un-Named
When he's before you

VOLDEMORT
But call me Tom Riddle, there will no question
That you'll provoke mucho grande aggression 

ALL
Ked, Ked Ked Ked Ked Kedavra 
Ked, Ked Ked Ked Ked Kedavra
Ked, Ked Ked Ked Ked Kedavra
Avada Kedravra! Oh!
Ked, Ked Ked Ked Ked Kedavra
Ked, Ked Ked Ked Ked Kedavra
Ked, Ked Ked Ked Ked Kedavra
Avada Kedravra
Curse!

(VOLDEMORT locates the Death-Eater who came up with this idiotic 
project, and strikes him dead)

      -	CMC

*By the claw you know the lion
**Cause of war