Superbureaucraticmagicaladministration (filk)

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 19408

Superbureaucraticmagicaladministration

Dedicated to Heidi Tandy

(To the tune of Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!, from Mary 
Poppins)

(THE SCENE: The Ministry of Magic Office. Enter LUDO BAGMAN)
 
BAGMAN
My days of flying Quidditch brooms
At last came to a close
A new career I then assumed 
That's far more grandiose
Whereas I once spent my whole day 
Attempting to dodge Bludgers
I am now earning all my pay
Working for Corny Fudgers

(Enter CORNELIUS FUDGE, BARTY CROUCH SR., PERCY WEASLEY, & AMOS 
DIGGORY)

ALL
Superbureaucraticmagicaladministration
We are the wizards who hold sway over the British nation
We wield great authority with no imagination
Superbureaucraticmagicaladministration
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay

PERCY
A cauldron must be just so thick 
So that it rightly bubbles

DIGGORY
To each precaution we must stick
To hide ourselves from Muggles

CROUCH
If magic's used at home by teens
An owl we'll send them flying

FUDGE
But if the Malfoys say they're clean 
We'll trust that they're not lying

ALL
Superbureaucraticmagicaladministration 
We are all quite adept at multiplying regulations
We're always being asked to please explain our explanations
Superbureaucraticmagicaladministration
Um diddle diddle diddle um diddle ay
Tom riddle riddle riddle tom riddle ay

PERCY (spoken)
Of course, you can always say it in Latin, which is 
Optimusimpeditusmagicusadministrationem, but that's probably 
incorrectly conjugated, wouldn't you say?

BAGMAN (spoken)
Certus!

CROUCH 
They say the Dark Lord has come back
For a new reign of terror
But if he thinks defense we lack 
He's made a deadly error

BAGMAN
`Cause we now have a foolproof scheme, 
Believe me, you can trust us
We've Bertha Jorkins on the scene
To bring him back to justice

ALL
Superbureaucraticmagicaladministration 
Voldemort will rue the day he launched his new invasion
`Cause we've approved a ruling which declares our condemnation
Superbureaucraticmagicaladministration!!!!

   - CMC