You Don't Want to Know Who We Are (filk)

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 29005

You Don't Want to Know Who We Are

(To the tune of If You Want to Know Who We Are, from Gilbert & 
Sullivan's The Mikado)

This filk was inspired by the recent thread on "Dementors
..Talking?" 
(26304 et al)

Dedicated to Megan (thanks for the "virus" analogy)

THE SCENE: Azkaban. Enter CHORUS OF DEMENTORS

CHORUS
You don't want to know who we are
We're dementors of Azkaban
Looking like someone poured tar 
O'er gowns of the Ku Klux Klan
Our presence you may find draining 
Our anatomy needs explaining
Popularity we're disdaining. Oh!

Please stop wondering how we chat
And spy à la Secret Police
Or just how Mom and Dad begat
To make our populace increase
Are we alive or just a virus?
Why did Fudge want to hire us?
Does Voldemort inspire us? Yo!

You don't want to know who we are
You don't want to see Azkaban
We're nothing like NPR
We're more like the Taliban

  -  CMC (enjoying the image of dementors singing in a choir)

HARRY POTTER FILKS 
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm