Food&Drink, Topic Summary and Questions

[pigwidgeon37 at yahoo.it]

No: HPFGUIDX 28045

Hallo everybody,

here's the topic summary due for today, I hope you enjoy it.
ATTENTION: Don't read when hungry- catastrophic results guaranteed!!


FOOD AND DRINK IN THE POTTERVERSE- TOPIC SUMMARY AND QUESTIONS


In one of her many interviews, JKR said that wizards generally live 
longer than Muggles. After a thorough research about food in the 
Potterverse and, above all, its magical part, the only possible 
conclusion is that Wizards don't have problems with cholesterol, 
otherwise their life span would be considerably shorter than that of 
the average Muggle. Let's have a look at what Hogwarts students are 
served at lunch, dinner and feasts (excluding Christmas): 
Pumpkin juice is the only drink ever mentioned for the students
Roast beef, roast chicken, fried sausages, stew, tripe (which 
McGonagall ironically offers Trelawney), pork chops, shepherd's pie, 
steak, Cornish pasties, lamb chops, sausages, bacon and steak, steak 
and kidney pudding, steak and kidney pie, black pudding, sandwiches 
(chicken and ham, for Harry and Ron in CoS); bread, marshmallows and 
crumpets (Harry and Ron roast them over the Common room fire during 
the Christmas holidays in PS/SS), baked pumpkin (at Halloween), roast 
potatoes, jacket potatoes, boiled potatoes, mashed potatoes, chips 
Yorkshire Pudding, peas, sprouts, carrots, gravy, ketchup, custard 
tart, Mint Humbugs, ice cream, apple pies, treacle tart, Spotted 
Dick, chocolate éclairs, chocolate gateau, jam doughnuts, Trifle, 
strawberries, jelly, rice pudding
In GoF, when the foreign students arrive, two non-British dishes 
appear on the tables: Bouillabaisse and "some kind of strange 
blancmange"
Breakfast is a little healthier, it becomes more understandable, 
though, why the students mostly sleep in Professor Binns's classes:
Porridge, rolls, orange juice, kippers, eggs and bacon, toast, 
buttered toast with jam, corn flakes.
Again, no fresh fruit, no yoghurt
And then, there are of course the 
Christmas treats:
Turkey, Chipolatas, thick rich gravy, cranberry sauce, turkey 
sandwiches (for tea), Christmas pudding, eggnog, crumpets, Trifle, 
Christmas cake. 
And when it gets really cold in the winter, the House Elves supply 
teachers and students with warming stews and savoury puddings- no 
wonder that Fleur Delacours criticizes "zis `eavy `ogwarts food".

QUESTION 1: Why do neither teachers nor students ever eat: Rice, 
pasta, fish, salad, fresh fruit (with the exception of strawberries)? 
They live on a diet of the most heavy and unhealthy food imaginable- 
just think what teaching or being taught three hours in the afternoon 
with your stomach full of Steak and Kidney pie and Trifle must be 
like!

For this massive assault of calories and cholesterol, students can 
prepare themselves already in Diagon Alley at Florian Fortecues Ice 
Cream Parlour and on the Hogwarts Express and, when they have their 
Hogsmeade weekends, there is no danger of eventually ingesting some 
healthy food. The lunch trolley on the train and Honeyduke's offer 
the following, mouth-watering articles:
Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans, Drooble's Best Blowing Gum, 
chocolate frogs, pumpkin pasties, cauldron cakes, Liquorice Wands, 
Pepper Imps, chocolate balls full of strawberry mousse and clotted 
cream, Sugar Quills, tooth flossing string mints, Jelly Slugs, 
nougat, coconut ice, toffees, Fizzing Whizbees, ice mice, peppermint 
toads, blood flavoured lollipops, Cockroach Cluster, fudge flies, 
Acid Pops, sherbet balls, pumpkin tart and ice creams and sundaes of 
various flavours. (The Cockroach Cluster is the only Monty Python 
citation I recognized in the books!)
After so many sweets, a wizard needs a drink and goes to the Three 
Broomsticks, where Madam Rosmerta will serve him or her Butterbeer, 
Red Currant Rum, Gillywater, cherry syrup and soda with ice and 
umbrella and mulled mead.
If the food at Hogwarts, Hogsmeade and on the train is life-
threatening, wizards at least are reasonable enough to cut back a 
little on alcohol. Alcoholic beverages are mentioned very rarely, 
there is Hagrid who evidently gets drunk from time to time, Draco 
tells Harry so when they first meet at Madam Malkin's (PS/SS), and 
this rumour is confirmed in PoA, when Hagrid tries to drown his grief 
about Buckbeak in large tankards full of what we can suppose to be 
either Ogden's Old Firewhisky or mulled mead. Firewhisky is used in 
GoF to restore Mrs. Weasley's shattered nerves after the QWC, 
Gilderoy Lockhart has other preferences for his birthday present, but 
wouldn't say no to a bottle of Ogden's. Butterbeer seems to be very 
slightly alcoholic (at least enough to knock out a House Elf), but is 
allowed to the students on their Hogsmeade weekends. On special 
occasions, like the dinner before the QWC, the grownups drink 
elderflower wine and, at Christmas, eggnog is served at the staff 
table of Hogwarts.
On the whole, alcohol is not too popular in the wizarding world and 
when we first meet the Death Eaters, having "fun" with the Robertsons 
after the QWC, Mr. Weasley suspects them of having drunk too much.
Students have to stick to pumpkin juice, orange juice at breakfast 
and there is also milk on the breakfast table, but obviously not for 
drinking(at least it is never mentioned that any of the students 
does), probably they pour it over the cornflakes. 
And then there is of course tea: Surprisingly not at breakfast, but 
as "social drink" in the afternoon: HRH several times have tea with 
Hagrid, Harry drinks tea with Lupin, at Christmas, there is no dinner 
but some kind of High Tea, Minister Fudge has tea with Harry at the 
beginning of PoA at the Leaky cauldron, Percy precipitously offers 
his boss, Mr.Crouch, a cup of tea at the QWC.

QUESTION 2: What do you think of the attitude towards the "popular 
drugs" coffee, nicotine and alcohol JKR confers to us by means of her 
books (cigarettes are never mentioned, alcohol mostly has unpleasant 
consequences and nobody ever drinks coffee in the wizarding world)? A 
clear message for Muggles like us or a sign that wizards are simply 
different and don't need certain things?

Then, we have two examples of "individual cooking" with various 
degrees of success: Hagrid doesn't seem to be much of a chef: Neither 
his baking (rock cakes and bath buns), nor his stoat sandwiches nor 
his alleged beef casserole (containing a large talon) leave HRH very 
enthusiastic, whereas Mrs. Weasley does a much better job of her 
cooking: Home made fudge, home baked mince pies, Christmas cake and 
nut brittle regularly accompany her children's Christmas presents and 
at the Burrow, where breakfast is pretty much like at Hogwarts, she 
prepares a wonderful dinner of chicken and ham pie, boiled potatoes, 
salad and home made strawberry ice cream before the QWC. An 
interesting detail is that for once, we are allowed to witness the 
process of magical cooking, which might be easier as the Sauce 
Béchamel comes directly out of her wand, but even if you are a witch, 
things may burn if you lack attention, and the cauliflower shrivels 
if your husband doesn't arrive in time for dinner .

QUESTION 3: What do you think about magical vs. elves' cooking? (Wand 
vs. elves' magic)

Sirius definitely seems to be the healthiest of all wizards, apart 
from the fact that as a dog he has to eat rats, but when Harry 
finally brings him and then sends him food by owl, he gets chicken 
drumsticks, bread, pumpkin juice, ham, cakes and- you won't believe 
it!- fruit.

Before leaving the wizarding part of the Potterverse and looking more 
closely at the Muggles' eating and drinking habits, there are two 
more categories worth mentioning: Animal food and ghost food.
In all four books, we learn about "normal" and magical animals. As 
far as the first category is concerned, there are only very few 
mentions of what they eat, obviously because they don't have 
different appetites in the Potterverse: Sirius lives on rats while he 
is hiding as a dog outside Hogsmeade (GoF) and Crookshanks craves 
spiders and rats (well, Wormtail, but anyway) and owls go hunting 
(only little Pigwidgeon gets an owl treat from time to time). 
Magical animals, on the other hand, have slightly disgusting, if not 
bizarre ways of nurturing themselves:
A bucket of brandy mixed with chicken blood every half hour is what 
makes baby dragons grow strong and healthy, so that they can finally 
pass to a more consistent diet of dead rats, eaten by the crate. 
Flobberworms are best fed shredded lettuce, however in small amounts, 
otherwise they might be in danger of a premature death (PoA). 
Buckbeak, the Hippogriff, seems to be quite happy when served 
sufficient quantities of dead ferrets (CONSTANT VIGILANCE, Draco!!) 
and a varied diet of ant eggs, frog livers and grass snake will 
obtain astonishing results with Blast Ended Skrewts, whereas the 
Beauxbatons horses are a little more stylish- they drink exclusively 
Single Malt Whisky.
Ghosts cannot eat, but if food has been exposed to natural rotting 
processes long enough, it seems that they are at least able to catch 
some of its aroma: Rotten fish, cakes burned charcoal black, maggoty 
haggis, cheese covered in furry green mould, cake with grey icing and 
peanuts covered in fungus are the savoury dishes Sir Nicholas de 
Mimsy- Porpington offers his guests at the Deathday Party (CoS).

QUESTION 4: Where do you think the Fat Lady got her chocolate liquors 
from? Did they have to be in another painting and she nicked them, or 
is there a possibility of getting objects like food, but also others 
into a painting without actually painting them there?

Adding the African wizards roasting what seems to be a rabbit over a 
violet fire, we may now leave the wizarding world and dedicate our 
attention to Muggle cooking. With very few exceptions, it is 
exemplified by what Mrs. Dursley prepares for her beloved ones and, 
surprise, surprise, it explains all too well why Dudley resembles a 
baby whale and Uncle Vernon is porky: Baby Dudley eats cereals, 
breakfast consists of bacon, fried eggs and toast, accompanied with 
tea, only when Dudley finally has to lose weight, breakfast is 
drastically reduced to a quarter of a grapefruit each. The same goes 
for their diet lunch, consisting of cottage cheese and grated celery. 
We have two examples of dinners, one for Uncle Vernon's business 
partner and the other for Aunt Marge, the latter is just described 
as "fancy dinner", washed down with wine and followed by coffee and 
brandy, the first one has roast pork as main course and the famous 
cake covered in whipped cream and sugared violets as dessert. This 
dinner, too, is followed by coffee and after dinner mints.
This in itself would be enough to shape Vernon's and Dudley's 
exuberant forms, but the final touch is added by various snacks, 
beginning with Dudley's favourites: Fizzy drinks, Burgers (to be 
eliminated from the fridge when his diet starts) and ice cream 
(including first a large chocolate ice cream and then one and a half 
Knickerbockers Glories at the zoo). To gain enough strength for his 
daily responsibilities at Grummning's, Uncle Vernon has to eat 
doughnuts (PS/SS) and fruit cake. Only when he is in a state of total 
panic, trying to escape the flood of letters from Hogwarts (PS/SS), 
food becomes of secondary importance to him: For the night in the hut 
he treats his family to a package of crisps and a banana each, which 
won't feel ickle Duddydums' stomach after a breakfast of stale 
cornflakes, toast and cold tinned tomatoes at the hotel.
Harry mostly eats with the Dursleys, but they never give him enough 
and things get worse when he is punished: In CoS he has to be 
satisfied with two slices of bread and a lump of cheese after a day 
of hard work in house and garden and when they lock him in his room, 
all he gets for dinner is tinned soup which Petunia doesn't even 
bother to warm up.

QUESTION 5: Vernon and Dudley Dursley are fat. Aunt Petunia is 
skinny, in spite of sharing the same meals. So far, we haven't heard 
of fat wizards, albeit their food is, to say the least, hypercaloric. 
Might this be an indication that Petunia is the one with yet 
unrecognized magical powers?

QUESTION 6: Do you think there might be a constitutional difference 
between wizards and Muggles? Do wizards have a better metabolism that 
prevents them from becoming obese? Don't they need vitamins?

Susanna/pigwidgeon37 (HUNGRYYYYYY!!!!)