Hermione/Ron/Krum (was sleeping woman)

[serenadust]

No: HPFGUIDX 37641

--- In HPforGrownups at y..., "Laura Huntley" <huntleyl at m...> wrote:

> Jo:
> >I've never quite been able to fathom what 
> >Krum was doing in fancying her, though.  Perhaps all those 
fangirls 
> >were just too scary for the athletically brilliant but socially 
> >backward Krum.


Laura wrote: 
> *indulgent smile* Silly.  Because she's brilliant, caring, etc. 
etc.  Plus, I think she's probably got that potential for a sort of 
dignified beauty that only adults notice and other kids totally 
miss -- especially now that her teeth are - erm, normal-sized.  I've 
known alot of girls like this -- all bone-y angles, bushy hair, and 
belligerent mannerisms -- but underneath you can just *tell*.


Me:
Hermione may be brilliant, caring, etc. but how would Krum know any 
of this?  He arrives at Hogwarts at Halloween, and sometime between 
then and the week before Christmas, he invites her to the ball.  
Granted, we only have Harry's point of view, but from the 
conversation we hear between Hermione and Krum at the ball, they 
barely know each other (he doesn't even know how to pronounce her 
name).  Obviously, he had to have had at least one other 
conversation with her when he invited her (unless he wrote her a 
note), but when she and Harry are talking about him in the library 
before the first task (late November), she doesn't seem to have even 
met him.  She's complaining because he's always in the library 
attracting lots of noisy girls who "only like him because he's 
famous" and observes that "He's not even good-looking".  It's pretty 
well implied that he's hanging around the library because of 
Hermione, but she hasn't figured this out yet.  Maybe he just finds 
her attractive, but again with that 4 year age difference (he's 
practically a grown man), I just think it's strange.


> Jo again:
> >Maybe this is why a romantic relationship between Harry and 
Hermione 
> >has always seemed to be so violently *wrong* somehow.  It seems 
that 
> >a mature Harry would not be able to romantically connect with 
such a 
> >maternal/domineering type.  I've never been one to believe that 
> >males *really* want to marry their mothers ;-).


Laura:
> Why does "caring" always equal "maternal" and "intelligent and 
independent" always equal "domineering" when people are referring to 
Hermione? *sighs melodramatically*  It's not that I think she's 
absolutely *perfect*, it's just that with you all calling out 
her "bad" points from the rooftops, I feel like she needs my support.


Me:
Er...you are joking, aren't you?  Hermione gets more support on the 
list than Harry does.  I really do like her, too (overall), but it 
seems that pointing out any flaw at all in her really upsets  
people.  
Of course "caring" doesn't equal maternal and 'intelligent and 
independent" doesn't always equal domineering (what's wrong with 
*maternal* anyway; does everyone hate mothers?), but people can be 
caring without insisting on telling others what to do.  Often the 
most caring thing you can do is just listen to someone, and show 
them enough respect to work through their own problems (unless, of 
course, you are *asked* for your opinion). Hermione hasn't learned 
this yet.  One of my favorite examples of "caring" in GoF is in 
Chapter 10 when Harry tells R/H about his scar hurting again, and 
about his worries about not having heard from Sirius.  Ron suggests 
that Harry join him and his brothers in a game of orchard Quidditch 
and Hermione insists they all *need* to go to bed.  Ron's the one 
who knows what Harry really *needs*, and it turns out to be the best 
thing for him.  I think this episode shows which of Harry's friends 
understands him best, and Harry responds to this by valuing Ron as 
the one he "will miss the most."
I really didn't intend for this to be a "Hermione vs Ron" rant.  I'm 
just frequently puzzled as to why so many readers value Hermione's 
contributions above Ron's, when it seems that JKR shows that they 
are at least of equal value to Harry.
> 

Jo Serenadust