Secret Chamber Plan (filk)

[coriolan_cmc2001]

No: HPFGUIDX 33926

Finally!  Professor Binns, that international specter of mystery, in 
his first filk!

Secret Chamber Plan (from CoS, Chap. 9)

(To the tune of Secret Agent Man)

Hear the original at: 

http://www.donwalker.net/mididonwalker.htm

Dedicated to Steve Vander Ark (HP4GU's very own Professor of Magical 
History)

THE SCENE: History of Magic classroom. The normal listlessness of 
PROFESSOR BINNS' class is abruptly dispelled when HERMIONE asks the 
question on everyone's mind



HERMIONE (spoken): Professor. I was wondering if you could tell us 
anything about the Chamber of Secrets


BINNS (scornfully): My subject is History of Magic.  I deal with 
facts, Miss Granger, not myths and legends
.The legend of which you 
speak is such a very sensational, even ludicrous tale
(relenting in 
the face of the students' interest) Oh, very well
..Let me see ... 
the Chamber of Secrets ...

(music)
When Hogwarts' founding parents first made pledge-ins
(An episode lost long ago to legend)
A dispute arose, it's told
If Mudbloods should be enrolled
Slyth'rin swore he'd not let that thin wedge edge in

Secret Chamber plan, Secret Chamber plan
His goal of ethnic cleansing was how this whole thing began

Slyth'rin, they say, then launched furtive construction
Of a place to purge Hogwarts of rank corruption
For in time his truest heir
Would unleash from this dark lair
A horror who would need no introduction

Secret Chamber plan, Secret Chamber plan
Salazar declared that Hogwarts School should ev'ry Mudblood ban

Of course this story is the merest fancy
It can't be true, there's not even a chance, see!
I deal only with the facts
And verified historic acts
Of the deeds of warlocks, goblins and of banshees

I'll disclaimers chant of this lame old rant
The story's too fantastic, and the proofs are far too scant!  

  - CMC

HARRY POTTER FILKS 
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm 
(freshly updated on 1/21/02)