[HPforGrownups] Hermione and Krum

[Laura Ingalls Huntley]

No: HPFGUIDX 39372

Pippin said:
What's Hermione playing at with Viktor
> anyway? Is anybody really comfortable about her being in a
> relationship with a seventeen year old boy?

Irene:

>>>>Yes, I'm comfortable with what we have seen so far.
>She really needed someone who respects her love of learning
>and sees her on her own and not as a part of the trio.<<<

AV:
>>>>I think she's "playing at" acknowledging the first 
good-looking boy who's ever responded to her _as a girl_ (not 
really counting Neville, who I think she feels too 
'maternal/teacherly' towards to ever consider 
romantically)straightforwardly and in a complimentary fashion 
(unlike Ron's dithering).
It's not totally "mature" I guess but I can't say I blame her. She's
probably curious to learn more about Durmstrang and Bulgaria, 
too. Nothingwrong with that either. They're _both_ at an age for 
short-lived
experimental dating--cut 'em some slack.<<<<

Zo?:
>>>What relationship? They went on a date to the Ball. And, as 
Hermione is the only non-Durmstrang person Viktor seems to 
have any contact with, she waschosen as his "most=missed" 
person for the 2nd challenge.  But relationship?
To my recollection, there isn't any contact between Herminone 
and Krum afterthe Ball. It doesn't seem like she agreed to go to 
meet him for the summer. It just doesn't smell like a relationship 
to me, at least from Hermione's state of mind.<<<<<

Pippin:
>This all goes to prove my point:  it could be a problem if Viktor's 
?feelings for Hermione are as intense as they seem to be.  Maybe 
>they aren't, of course; there's always narrative twist. <g> Still, The 
>Second Task happens after the ball, and that's when Viktor tells 
>her he's "never felt this way about anyone else." Experimental 
>flings and mature attitudes are all very well, but he's of age, by 
>the laws of his world, and she isn't. Whatever it is, it's not a 
>relationship of equals.

How can you be so sure?  In my experience, the only way relationships of this type are unequal is if the younger member (in this case the girl) is head-over-heels in love/adoration with the older member.  That's not Hermione at all...in fact, I believe her anti-fan-girl attitude is what drew Krum to her to begin with (besides her intelligence and (dubious?) physical attractiveness)..

Which leads me to believe that he's definitely the submissive type in a relationship (and I mean that in a totally non-S&M kind of way)...honestly, if he wanted a relationship in which he had all the power, he would have had no problem getting it.  But he didn't want that, did he?  No, he went straight for the one girl in Hogwarts who *wasn't* going to give him an inch, let alone let him walk all over her.

At that age range it's all in the attitude.  It's a sad, but true, fact that in any relationship the person who cares the least has the most power -- and in this case, that person is Hermione. 



>I'm sure Viktor is a gentleman with Hermione. But it would be 
>kind of odd if Viktor had such intense feelings and they didn't 
>have an erotic component, even if it's only a wistful fantasy  about 
>what she'll be like when she's as mature and sophisticated as 
>she looked on the night of the ball. (If not, he's considerably less 
>imaginative than a lot of our list members!) 

Sure, but I just don't think it's an issue...and believe me, I'm the first person to get up in arms about inappropriate relationships..

I know JKR often writes the trio as younger than they actually are, but the fact remains that some of you adultish types seem to underestimating the worldliness of girls in the 14/15 age range...Trust me, they aren't as innocent as they seem, and they've got iron wills.  I'm sure Hermione knows *exactly* what she's doing/getting into and has weighed the situation accordingly.  Like I said before, if Hermione idolized Krum, I'd be worried...but she does nothing of the sort.  She can barely give him the time of day, really.


>Hermione doesn't, or shouldn't, have to deal with that. She 
>doesn't have to set any boundaries with Viktor. She can rightfully 
>expect him to do it for her. However,  learning to manage her 
>feelings is part of what she needs to do in order to become a 
>responsible adult, so, in a way, she's dodging the issue as 
>much as Ron is.

Your logic seems a little sketchy to me here.

And, anyway, again -- does Hermione seem like the kind of girls to let *others* set the boundaries for her?  Heck no.  And she's all ready pretty fair at managing her feelings.

>I'm sure at the Ball  Hermione felt as if she'd sailed right past the 
>awkward transition from girl to woman without ever going 
>through it. But that's not the real her, not yet. She was pretending 
>that night. Whether you think she's fourteen or fifteen, she 
>couldn't keep up the illusion for very long. "Standing ten feet 
>apart, they were bellowing at each other, each scarlet in the 
>face"..."her hair was coming down now out of its elegant bun and 
>her face was screwed up in anger." That's JKR showing us 
>Hermione isn't quite up to her image.

What?? A mature young woman's image is automatically out the window if she yells at her best friend for being a petty, vicious idiot to her?? (sorry Ron.)  And IMO, I think Hermione knew better than anyone else that night that she was *pretending*...if not, we would have seen her desperately trying hold on to the "image" afterwards...which she didn't BTW.  She was perfectly frank with Harry about how she managed the hair -- and how it was too much work to do everyday.

I remember the night of eight grade graduation -- it was a pretty big deal for my small, nearly all-girl class...I got my hair done by my hairdresser and wore what amounted to a *very* no-frills prom dress (one of my friends had this big poofy thing that looked like a wedding dress)...

The compliments were great and I definitely walked a little straighter for the evening...but I never for one second thought that This Was It...like I was finished growing up now or anything..it was a nice feeling while it lasted, but I knew that tomorrow my hair would be hanging down my back again -- unbrushed, and my clothing wouldn't fit quite right, and everything would be the same as it was before.

And Hermione's got to be at least a hundred times more sensible than me.  

>I feel bad for Viktor. There's a real potential for Hermione to hurt 
>him. I don't think she's leading him on deliberately, but she's too 
>young and inexperienced, IMO, to realize she might be doing it 
>inadvertently. 

Probably, but that's life, you know?  He's only 17...heck, *I'm* 17..I certainly expect to be hurt several times over in the course of my dating career...They're *both* young.  It's nearly inevitable at that age that all your relationships are going to be relatively short and end painfully -- that's all there is to it.

laura


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