Werewolf of London? Paris? Where?

[southernscotland]

No: HPFGUIDX 37169

This just struck me on the re-reading of the books:

Where was Remus during the time that Harry was with the Dursleys? Why 
did he never attempt to contact him, or if he did, why did Dumbledore 
not allow him to do so?

Also, in Book 3, why didn't he tell Harry right up front who he was? 
Like, "I was in a very tight group of friends at Hogwarts, which 
included your father. Unfortunately, I'm the only one still around 
here. I'm so sorry he's dead, come here and I'll tell you all about 
him and your mom." 

And should Harry be mad about this omission?

In the book, it seems that Remus is shown to be kind, gentle, 
quiet, and good-hearted, especially in contrast with the more 
bombastic Sirius. But it seems to me that, in keeping with his 
character, he would have been more concerned about Harry than he 
seems to be, and would have wanted a relationship with him. 

After all, Sirius, while indeed the godfather, is always beating 
himself up about not being around for Harry. As far as I know, Remus 
could have indeed been there for the boy (during the right times of 
the month, that is). I know he's a werewolf and all, but he wouldn't 
have had to tell Harry that if he hadn't wanted to. Harry would have 
been just as happy to have had an "uncle" who didn't hate him. 

Remus consoles Sirius that Sirius couldn't have done anything 
different for Harry, since he was in prison, but never once brings up 
the fact that he, Remus, could have looked after the boy himself, at 
least somewhat. And why didn't Sirius think of this, and take Remus 
to task about it? Wouldn't Sirius have been a bit disappointed in the 
(non)actions of his friend? 

If Dumbledore hadn't wanted Remus to visit Harry, he could have at 
least written him letters, or something. He could have even left out 
the "you're a wizard" part. 

And if Dumbledore purposely kept them apart, even after Harry's first 
and second years at Hogwarts, why? This seems cruel to me. 

Maybe Remus was so traumatized by the whole murder thing that he 
wanted to forget them all. It seems a shame, however, that Harry 
couldn't have gotten to know him, at least a little, while Harry was 
still a child. Both of them would have benefited from the 
relationship. And why doesn't Remus show any guilt over this?

Maybe the Marauders weren't quite as "thick-as-thieves" as we 
thought? Or is there another reason? 

Confused about the non-lurking Lupin,

lilahp