Hermione and Ron (SHIP)

[pippin_999]

No: HPFGUIDX 38691

I argued against the H/H ship:
 >>Are you really saying that Ron has more emotional 
 problems than Harry? Harry, who can't remember what it's like 
to  be hugged, who has recurring nightmares, whose worst fears 
are powerful enough to incapacitate him?>>>>

Penny:
>>>>> No.  I think we're talking about two separate issues (at 
least) here.  You're right Pippin that Harry is emotionally fragile 
and may not have the capacity to engage in a romantic 
relationship at all (for a long time or even ever) -- with Hermione 
or Ginny or Cho or anyone.  He has no memories of intimacy and 
no good models for successful intimate relationships.  <<

Except that he's got his hormones pushing him <g>

Penny:
> >>>But, his emotional fragility is an entirely separate issue 
from his insecurities.  Harry is insecure, but in a radically 
different way than Ron IMO.  Harry's insecurity amounts to lack of 
confidence; he's never had positive feedback in his life before 
Hogwarts. <<<<<

 IMO, Harry's missing a whole lot more than positive feedback. I 
see what you're saying about Harry as more applicable to Ron. 
Ron's the one who just needs some positive feedback, a sense 
that what he's doing matters to somebody.  IMO, Ron wants to 
feel that his friends and family appreciate him. I don't see him as 
needing strokes from any one else. He's not miserable because 
Harry got chosen Tri-wizard Champion, remember, but because 
he thinks Harry didn't take him into his confidence about it. 
Whatever jealousy he has of Harry's fame and wealth is minor. 
He's seen enough of Malfoy to know that wealth isn't everything, 
and that Harry's fame comes with the price of a nice shiny target 
on his back.

 Harry, OTOH, has been forced to relive his parents' murder, 
seen a friend killed in front of him, been raised by adults who 
refuse to touch him, learned that his mother died to save him 
and  above all that there is a very heavy burden of expectation on 
him to see that she didn't die in vain.  I feel that if Harry  connects 
with anyone on a more intimate level, it's going to knock the 
scabs off some of those wounds.  When that happens, he's 
going to be  less functional than he is now, I think, and a lot more 
demanding of whoever he's with. I think those emotional 
demands would be pretty hard on someone who is thoroughly 
wrapped up in a lifestyle of achievement.

 Harry might be satisfied at first to hook up with someone who 
didn't overtax his capacity for intimacy, but I think after a while he 
would start to wonder what was missing in his life and I think, if 
his partner was Hermione, she would feel the same. It's pretty 
hard to feel close to someone when  you're hiding your feelings 
from them.


Penny:
>>>So, he has low self-confidence.  He also shuns the spotlight 
& his fame.  But, his insecurities wouldn't be reinforced with 
every success that his girlfriend achieved; quite the opposite it 
would seem.  It almost appears that Harry would be happiest as 
the quieter "background" figure in any romantic relationship. 

 Any of her successes would simply remove some of the 
attention off of him, which he would welcome IMO. <<<<

But is this ever going to  happen?  I don't think any coming 
volumes will be titled "Hermione Granger and ...."  Harry will be 
the center of attention as long as he remains part of the 
wizarding world. IMO,  it won't matter if  Hermione gets elected 
Minister of Magic, discovers the cure for dragonpox, wins the 
Order of Merlin and chases a Snitch  through London naked on a 
broomstick at the age of 75. If H/H happens  the Daily Prophet  
will still bill her as Harry's partner. Somehow, I don't think she'd  
be really happy about that <g>


Pippin