Axeman! (filk)

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 46183

Axeman! (PoA, Chap. 16)

To the tune of The Beatles' Taxman

Dedicated to Maria

Hear it at: 

http://www.wtv-zone.com/jade-11

THE SCENE: Behind HAGRID's cottage. Enter McNAIR in executioner's 
robes, as he prepares to carry out Buckbeak's death sentence. HAGRID 
and the TRIO express their consternation.

MCNAIR
Let me tell you 
How it will be
That hippogriff 
Is History

Cause I'm the axeman
Yeah I'm the axeman 

Just ten percent 
Right off the top
When Buckbeak meets my
Fatal chop

Cause I'm the axeman
Yeah I'm the axeman

Hagrid went too far
And met defeat
This vicious beastie
I'll now delete

HAGRID
At the set of sun
Malfoy's ally
Will avenge his boy,
Poor thing must die

HAGRID &  TRIO
Axeman!

Cause he's the axeman
Yeah he's the axeman

HARRY (and MCNAIR)
Can't someone please ask Dumbledore
(Uh, Uh, Mr. Potter)

HAGRID (and MCNAIR)
That Committee his voice ignores
(Uh, huh, Mr. Malfoy)

HAGRID &  TRIO
Cause he's the axeman
Yeah he's the axeman

McNAIR & (HAGRID & TRIO)
All those who would the 
Malfoys strike
(Axeman!)
Will meet an end that
They won't like
(Axeman!)

(Exit McNAIR, HAGRID, & Buckbeak, toward the chopping block)

TRIO
'Cause he's the axeman.
Yeah, he's the axeman,
And he's showing no signs of mercy

(The TRIO hears "the unmistakable swish and thud of an axe.")

Axeman!

  - CMC (joyously singin' the original since the polls closed)

HARRY POTTER FILKS 
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm