TBAY - Snape the Killer (WAS Re: Assassin!Snape's Next Victim)

[lucky_kari]

No: HPFGUIDX 46853

"Hello everybody!" calls out Eileen, wandering into the Royal George Pub. 

Everyone stares at her. She realizes that they have been in here too
long to appreciate her blithe chipperness. Everyone that is, but a
woman in the corner who stands up with a smile on her face and...

"Julia Charis!" cries Eileen. "Long time, no see! We've been bemoaning
your disapearance for a while. Elkins even sent me a snippet of one of
your old posts with the header "I miss Charis Too." And when I
referenced you in my Crouch post, I was just praying that you would
come back. What do you have to enlighten us today?"

"Something very simple. Dumbledore wouldn't order Snape to kill
Karkaroff, and Snape isn't going to do something Dumbledore would
condemn."

"Very good," said Eileen.

Marina and Cindy glare at her. 

"A butterbeer, George" says Eileen. 

"Wimpy Canadian," mutters Cindy. "You don't understand real drinks or
real big bangs."

"But I like butterbeer" protests Eileen. "And I like my Snape Georgian."

"Here you are," says George, with a heartstopping smile. 

"Here," says Cindy wildly. "I'll explain it all. With diagrams!" 

"Cindy, I understand it," says Eileen. "I just don't like it. That is
all. You can not argue with the choice of the soul."

"Of the soul, I can say nothing," said Cindy. "But speaking in the
interests of the public..." (1)

"Is that Avery over in the corner?" interrupts Eileen. She rushes up
to the corner. "Aves, you really shouldn't be drinking so much brandy.
Dangerous stuff."

Avery sighs, and pours himself another glass.

"George, you shouldn't let him continue with this self-destructive
behaviour," objects Eileen.

"Drowns the remorse, though," snickers Cindy. 

"What's wrong, Aves?" asks Eileen.

"You mean other than kidnapping him, selling Avery Hall to the
condominium developers, using the proceeds to buy a hovercraft that
you don't even use, re-enacting the "Forgive us all!" scene in front
of his eyes, making him slave away for the Fantastic Posts people, and
generally bossing him about?" asks Julia Charis.

"Well, yes," says Eileen.

"I think I know what might be wrong with him," says a newcomer. "I
told him my theory and it seemed to depress him. Hi, I'm Wendy. Is
there another Wendy on the list?"

"Not that I know of," says Eileen. "Wendy, can I confess that I wanted
to be a Wendy when I was a kid?"

Wendy smiles politely. "I'm just not up to trying an actual TBAY post
myself, so this will just be a plain old response," she says.

"And I'm not up to trying plain old responses," says Eileen with a
grin, "so this will just be a TBAY post. Everyone should feel free to
switch in and out of TBAY, as long as it's headed properly. After all,
it's all canon discussion."

"Thankyou," said Wendy. "I am fascinated by this new theory of
Cindy's, but I see you're not."

"Oh, I don't know. I heard you talking about Dumbledore not approving
of killing Snape. I thought that was a lovely litle point."

"I suppose that MAGIC DISHWASHER Dumbledore might not have a problem
with this? But I don't subscribe to that theory in any case)," said Wendy.

"I'm not sure about MAGIC DISHWASHER Dumbledore," says Eileen. "He
confuses me. I do want to see that metapost Grey Wolf is proposing.
But anyway, I'm with you about Dumbledore. What about Snape?"

"OK. I certainly believe that horrendously awful things were done by
Death Eaters. Rape, torture, murder, pretty much any sort of atrocity
you can think of are all within the realm of possibility. But it was
only OTHER Death Eaters who did those things. <G> Not my precious
Snape. Oops. Did I say precious? <G> (Yes, I must admit I count myself
among the "SnapeFan" population here)"

"Aves darling," says Eileen, "don't worry."

"What's wrong with him anyway?" asked Wendy. 

"You've hit on Avery's sore point," says Eilene with a smile. 
 
"Seriously, though, I don't believe that Snape, as a Death Eater, ever 
directly killed anyone," continues Wendy. (Avery groans.)

"Or perhaps killed just one person and the emotional aftermath of that
for him  was enough to send him running back to Dumbledore's camp,"
Wendy adds. (George moans.)

"Look, who are those two?" asks Wendy, "And why do they look like
they've just swallowed poison?"

"This is Avery, Death Eater, one of Snape's gang of Slytherins, a
nerveless hysteric and sycophant. And this is George, a Snapetheory,"
says Eileen. "And while your opinion on Snape is common enough, I
don't subscribe to it. You see, I think it really cheapens Snape's
redemption story to say he never was as horrible as those others.
"Nothing like Avery and the rest, who were complete sadists." That by
the way is why Avery's upset. Where's Elkins? Why plagiarize her when
I can have her speak for herself?"

"The storm is coming," says Elkins, who is furiously working on the
LupiFAQ, her glass of wine untouched. 

"Yes, I know, but could you spare a moment to talk about Snape?"

"Oh yes, Snape. Let's see. "Antagonism to Remus Lupin," especially "Is
Snape as edgey as Lupin?" That'd be posts..."

"Forget Lupin for a moment. Just pure, unadulterated Snape, with a
side helping of shades-of-grey DE friends," says Eileen, taking the
Lupin posts from Elkins' hands.

Elkins moans. "Oh all right," she says. "Message 33804: Hello. Newbie
here, bleary and dry-eyed and trembling from weeks of staring at the
computer screen reading old posts, and now finally ready to de-lurk
with a few comments on Snape, the DEs,and the Longbottoms." Let's see.
I think this is what you want. " We hear a great deal about Rowling's
statement of intent to show how genuinely *bad* evil is in these
books, and I laud that sentiment. But evil is also *complicated,* and
there are times when I find myself wishing that Rowling would run a
little further with that particular ball."

"I followed that up," continues Elkins, "in a later post: Message
35196, "And I think that that tension, that contrast between Snape's
instincts and his intellect, has always been central to how I've read
the character. I do not, for example, tend to see Snape as a person
struggling with conflicting impulses, precisely. Rather, I tend to
see him as someone whose *impulses* all lead him in one unerring
direction -- but in a direction that he has chosen to reject on
abstract and purely philosophical grounds. In other words, I see him
as a Dark Wizard. In instinct. In impulse. In inclination. To
some extent, perhaps even in essence. But by choosing not to act on
those instincts and inclinations and tastes and desires, he manages
to be something slightly different. Grey. Neither fish nor fowl, as
you wrote, but neither fish nor fowl in a slightly different *way,* I
think, than many others have read him.

The suggestion that Snape left the DEs because when it came right
down to it, he lacked a taste for torture or murder, for example, has
always left me a bit cold because in my reading of Snape, of *course*
he has a taste for it. A taste for it is *exactly* what he's got.
His taste for it...well, that's sort of his problem, isn't it?

It comes to the same thing, in many ways. But it leads to a lot of
different assumptions. I, for example, assume that of *course* Snape
would enjoy the company of the sort of people who become Death Eaters
(at least, to whatever extent he enjoys company at all). They would
share his tastes, and his inclinations, and his aesthetics, and his
interests, and probably his sense of humor as well. They wouldn't
share his *principles,* of course, which is the sticking point, but
on grounds of pure compatability, they would be far better
companionship for him than the vast majority of the people who *do*
share his principles."

"There, may I go back to my LupiFAQ?" says Elkins peevishly. 

"Yes, thankyou," says Eileen. "So, Wendy, there you have it. We've
debated about it on the list beforehand, and I think we could do with
another debate again. Fascinating little topic. Pippin, leave George
alone."

Pippin glares in Eileen's general direction. "I thought you weren't
paying me any attention," she complains.

"In TBAY, one can listen to two conversations at once," says Eileen.
"Interesting theory there with Sirius, but would Dumbledore approve?"

Eileen

(1) - That little exchange is from G.K. Chesterton's "The Napoleon of
Notting Hill" - hilarious little book.