[HPforGrownups] Snape is NOT Sexy

[Sushi]

No: HPFGUIDX 56374


>Sarah wrote:

>Is it fanfiction?  has fanfic created a grey area between canon and
>fanon, whereby Snape is now a character of sexual fantasy and
>discourse.  Is Fanfiction to blame?  Or is it merely an outlet?


         You make a frighteningly good argument.  Yes, Snape is an ugly, 
greasy, unhealthy-looking, cruel... well, an argument could be made for 
"monster".  However, despite all this, he's sexy as Hell.  My view on 
things is probably a little warped, so bear with me.

         Filch fits most of the qualifiers.  He's not exactly a GQ model, 
he takes great glee in scaring the bodily substances out of students en 
masse, and he's... let's just say he's a little odd.  By that, I mean that 
Mrs. Norris is the love of his life (probably asexually, unless she's an 
Animagus - won't get into that).  He's not sexy, though, because he's 
lacking one serious detail: POWER.

         The man's a Squib.  On top of that, he's the groundskeeper, not a 
"proper" authority figure.  I've never even seen an example of him being 
allowed to take points, something even some students (prefects) can 
do.  Snape, on the other hand, not only has his shiny I'm A Wizard badge 
(with all relevant rights and secret offers), he's got authority.  He can 
ruin your life because he feels like it, or he can reward you beyond your 
dreams (if you're in Slytherin).  He not only *has* power, he's not afraid 
to use/abuse it.  I think that gets into the "Why the Death Eaters?" issue, 
but that's another can of worms.

         Just for the record, I also think Voldemort is hot beyond 
words.  Like I said, I'm a little warped.

         At least in my case, the Snape thing isn't based on Alan 
Rickman.  My opinions were formed before I'd even heard he'd been 
cast.  It's not his voice, either - my Snape's voice is significantly more 
sibilant and bowel-chilling, and not traditionally sexy.  Alan did a 
brilliant job, IMO, but he's not the Snape I've got in my head.  That one 
goes stag to dances because he can't get a date, and has been known to 
resort to, ah, red light districts to, er, take care of certain 
business.  He's not a pleasant creature by any definition, yet I'm 
smitten.  (Not complaining about Alan, mind.  Just saying that taste is a 
funny thing.)  Fanfiction has only ever been an outlet, although I'll admit 
I've softened him up a little too much at times. *slaps self*bad writer!*

         It's been said that power is the most potent aphrodisiac in the 
world.  Snape's a good example of that.

Sushi, who will refrain from writing the essay, "Why Power Hasn't Made 
Dumbledore Into A Sex Symbol", because, well, the man's 150 years old and 
doesn't flaunt the power he's got (bad Albus!)


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