Sirius confusing Harry and James

Fri Aug 8 01:18:24 UTC 2003

No: HPFGUIDX 75997

jwpgh wrote:

> Calling the relationship delusional or even illusional (is that a 
> word?) seems harsh to me.  Part of the problem here was that these 
> 2 people just didn't know each other very well, and when you are in 
> the early stages of a relationship it's easy to make incorrect 
> assumptions.  The person you're getting to know reminds you of 
> someone else, or they look like someone else, or you misinterpret 
> their actions...any or all of these can happen. 

*nod*

Sirius and Harry were tied together by James and Lily's choices, not
their own. They're really _family_, with the involuntary connection that
family implies. Both did choose to try to make it work; Sirius could have
relinquished any claim on Harry and Harry could have tried to avoid Sirius.
Instead, Sirius does everything he can to fulfill his responsibility to Harry
and Harry makes it clear that he is immediately willing to accept Sirius,
dubious history and all.

For me this explains why Harry seems to have such a sudden affection 
for Sirius. It's not that he knows much about Sirius at all, it's that he
trusts his parents, accepts Sirius as part of his family (something he is
desperately hungry for) and does his best to go from there, including
risking his life for Sirius after knowing him for an hour. This would tell
you more about Harry than it does about Sirius- except that Sirius has
done basically the same thing.

> Yes, they needed each other and that need drove some of their 
> behavior toward each other.  But they would have come to know each 
> other better over time and with closer and more regular contact.  I 
> don't see any evidence that Sirius really ever confused Harry with 
> James.  James would be his point of reference for Harry, of course-
> all of us who know our friends' children look for the adult in the 
> child.  But Sirius said what he said in OoP out of frustration, not 
> confusion.  Molly was just being spiteful.  

Sirius said what he did out of frustration with his own situation. Harry
refuses Sirius's plan out of protectiveness for Sirius; this is what makes
Sirius angry. He feels powerless, and in his anger he fires off a comment
that he *knows* will get to Harry. Which was uncalled for, unfair- and 
very human.

Also Sirius has little experience being a grownup; he reverts to
thinking in pranks and escapades at times. He wants a James, no
question. But there is no genuine confusion, I don't think.

Molly is afraid for Harry and a little jealous. She acts as a parent figure
and protector for Harry (in the Boggart scene she clearly counts him as one
of her loved ones right along with her children) and Sirius is now competing
for that position. IMO she doesn't think much of Sirius's ability to keep
Harry safe, and well, given Sirius's history and wanted fugitive status she
has some reason to worry. She's spiteful on purpose, but she feels this is
justified if it discourages Sirius.

> As for the darker direction of the next books...