FILK: Mundungus Man

[Phyllis]

No: HPFGUIDX 76572

FILK:  Mundungus Man

To the tune of Billy Joel's "Piano Man"

(Dedicated to those characters mentioned in passing in earlier books 
who receive fuller development later in the series.)

It's Twelve Grimmauld Place on my first day
Dumbledore's old crowd shuffles in
There's a rag pile sitting next to me
Making love to his tobacco tin

He says, "Son, I owe you an apology
But I had a real need to flee
See, I would not have left
Except I was to net
A business opportunity"

Puff on your pipe you're the Mundungus Man
Puff on your pipe tonight
Well we're not in the mood for a smelly cloud
And you've got us feeling uptight

Now Sirius was my father's best friend
He sometimes confuses me
And he's quick to confess or to clean up the mess
But there's someplace that he'd rather be

He says, "Harry, I think this is killing me"
As a smile ran away from his face
"Well, I'm sure that I could help the Order out
If I could get out of this place"

Now Lupin is an unemployed werewolf
For whom there is no lasting cure
And he's talking with brother Bill, who's with Gringotts still
And probably will marry Fleur 

And Fred and George are practicing magic tricks
As Mrs. Weasley quickly gets mad
They have a talent for making happiness
Which is better than keeping us sad

Cut us a deal you're the Mundungus Man
Cut us a deal tonight
Well we're not in the mood for a pleaseman bust
And you've got us feeling uptight

It takes a skillful crowd to fight Death Eaters
And Mr. Weasley gives me a smile
`Cause he knows it's my fate to be Voldemort's bait
To rid the world of wizards so vile

And the Black portraits sound like a carnival
And the door handle looks like a snake
And they sit at the table and dole stew with a ladle 
And say "When will we get our big break?"

Stay on your guard you're the Mundungus Man
Stay on your guard tonight
We're not in the mood for a dementor's kiss
And you've got us feeling uptight

~Phyllis
who has caught filker's fever!