TBAY/SHIP: _She_

[anguaorc <fausts@attglobal.net>]

No: HPFGUIDX 52861

--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "derannimer <susannahlm at y...>" 
<susannahlm at y...> wrote:
> Apologies in advance to Angua for the Room of State

You'd better apologize!  You have NO IDEA of the trouble I'm going to 
be in when Cap'n Kathy finds out I've been sitting on her throne and 
pretending to be her.  Urp.  She may even set the dread pirate Moey 
on me!

***********************************

Angua paces back and forth on the deck, sniffing the air, the hackles 
on the back of her neck rising.  There is danger on the Good Ship R/H 
this evening, her werewolf senses tell her.  An intruder, perhaps?  
No – impossible!  All are welcome on the Good Ship (once they have 
seen the light of the Blinding Flash of the Obvious).  What could the 
danger be?

The captain and the other officers keep Angua fed with scraps of raw 
meat and the occasional morsel of fanfic – she owes them her loyalty 
and protection.  But how can she protect them if she can't even sniff 
out the source of her unease?

Suddenly, there is a loud splashing in the water of Theory Bay.  
Someone is climbing up the side of the ship.  Angua lopes to the 
bulkhead and looks over – it's Susanne!  Angua latches onto her 
collar and pulls her onto the deck.  Susanne is gasping and waving a 
soaked piece of paper wildly about.

"Spies, spies!" she sputters.

"Spies?"  Angua's fur bristles again.  Perhaps this is the danger she 
has been sensing!  "What?  Where?"

"Look!" says Susanne.  "Published right here in the Daily Prophet – 
it's talking about *us* on our ship!"

Angua noses the wet sheet.  Derannimer, eh?  Must be a new reporter.  
Probably ferreting around the Good Ship, looking for mess-ups


"Don't worry," she says loftily.  "No one will believe that pile of 
old rubbish.  It's just that Derannimer woman making things up.  
Everyone knows she's got it in for the Good Ship."

Susanne nods in relief, but then frowns.  "There's something funny, 
though," she says.  "How could Derannimer have known
?"  She points 
toward the paper.

Angua gasps in shock as she makes out the blurry words.

> On the throne is a woman, with an awful lot of dark hair, who is 
> looking at Derannimer in a rather sniffy sort of way.

"She – she knows what I look like!  She knows how I *act*!  She knows 
that I
"  Angua blushes scarlet as she says this and determinedly 
avoids Susanne's eyes. "
sometimes sit on the throne when nobody's 
looking."

"What?" says Susanne, dropping her Good Ship limited-edition `Show 
Your Love, Spew Some Slugs' coffee mug with a loud clunk.

Angua's eyes shift uneasily.  "Look, forget it, okay?  What I want to 
know is how she's spying on us!"

"Maybe it was a lucky guess," says Susanne hopefully.

"A lucky guess!"  Angua snorts.  "Look at this bit."
  
> Derannimer surveys her teacup critically for a moment, then speaks.
> 
> "Well. You've gone to a fair bit of trouble to get me here. What do 
> you want to talk to me about?"
> 
> "Ron and Hermione," says Angua immediately.

"See!  She *knows* us!  She knows what we talk about.  We'll have to 
research magical methods of eavesdropping and see if we can figure 
out how
"

"Angua!"

"If she's doing what I think she's doing, it's *definitely* not 
allowed
"

"ANGUA!" Susanne shouts, rather red in the face.

"What?"

"EVERYONE knows that's what we talk about.  It's the name of our 
ship, remember?"

"Oh, yeah – but, uhh, look at this."  She points with her paw to 
another part of the article.
 
> "So," she continues cheerfully. "Hermione. Look here, if she 
> *doesn't* like Ron, why doesn't she just *tell him* whether or not 
> she's going to Bulgaria?"
>  
> "*You* might not tell him. But *I* would. I would look him straight 
> in the eye and tell him about Krum, giving him the bad news as soon 
> as possible. I would *never* act like Hermione does, and refuse to 
> tell him whether or not I had accepted Krum's invitation, leaving 
him 
> in suspense for months. If Hermione knows Ron likes her and doesn't 
> like him, I think that is cruel. 
> 
> "Of course, if she likes him and is frustrated because he won't 
admit 
> he likes her, I don't think it's cruel at all, but perfectly 
> understandable." 

"That's exactly what I said!  I said those exact words!  Maybe she's 
bugging us
"

"Ahem."  Susanne clears her throat politely.  "You said that on the 
record, didn't you?"

"Oh... yeah
"

"The point," says Susanne briskly, "is what are we going to say in 
response."

"What?"  The werewolf looks puzzled.  

"Look," Susanne says.  "Everyone reads the Daily Prophet.  Well, a 
lot of people do, anyway.  Are you going to let her arguments go 
unanswered?"

Angua leaps to her feet and howls.  "AROOOOOOO
."

"I didn't think so," Susanne says with a smirk.  "Now
."  She reads:
  
> Derannimer sets down her own cup in her own saucer. "Well, to begin 
> with, I think your entire premise is flawed." 
>  
> "You say she "refuses" to tell Ron, leaving him "in suspense for 
> months." I mean, it's a tad hyperbolic to say the least, and simply 
> *incorrect* to say the most."
>  
> "Well, I mean, honestly, she *didn't* refuse to tell him.
> 
> "The first time he asks her, she was too embarrassed talking about 
> Viktor to even *notice* Ron's question, and the second time, she's 
> interupted by Snape." 
> 
> Angua, who has been frowning, suddenly breaks in. 
> 
> "I don't believe she "didn't notice" it." she says flatly. 
> 
> Derannimer stares at her. "Well, okay. So what *do* you believe? 
> After all, he interupts her in mid-sentence, and when she resumes 
> speaking, the text says that she "went on." Which, to my mind, 
> indicates that she is simply, well, *going on.* *Continuing.* 
> Speaking as if she had not been interupted. She gives no indication 
> of having heard him--she simply *ignores* him. And I honestly 
thought 
> that she ignored him because she hadn't noticed him. There isn't 
any 
> other reason for her to ignore him, considering that she starts to--
"

"So
 what do you want to say to that?"

Angua snorts.  "Who does she think she's fooling with that one?  
*Continuing*?  Let's put the two sentences together, shall we?  `
and 
then he sort of pulled me away from the judges so they wouldn't hear, 
and he said, if I wasn't doing anything over the summer, would I like 
to and he *did* say he'd never felt the same way about anyone else
'  

Angua paces back and forth.  "Does that make sense?  Is that your 
idea of *continuing*?  `Cause it sure isn't mine!  If you think
"

"Hey, hey!"  Susanne puts her hands up in front of her throat.  Those 
werewolf teeth are rather sharp.  "*I* didn't say it.  I agree with 
you, remember?"

Angua growls in her throat.  "Why did Hermione `go so red now that 
Harry could almost feel the heat coming from her'?  *Obviously* 
because Ron was looking at her, and grinding his pestle
" Angua 
pauses for a wolfish grin.  "
 and asking her questions.  Why else?"

"Well, umm," stutters Susanne, "some people think she was just 
embarrassed.  You know, to talk about the things Krum said."

Angua turns on her with a low growl, and Susanne retreats 
nervously.  "Some people!  Not me!"

"I've never noticed that Hermione was DEAF," continues the werewolf 
fiercely.  "She's just ignoring Ron, as she does many times in 
canon.  She heard him, all right!  She was just avoiding the 
question."

"Errr – you already said that.  Here."  Susanne points to the paper 
again.

> "Yeah there *is*," snaps Angua, "she doesn't want to answer the 
> *question.*"

"Da** straight," mutters Angua, reading on.

> "No there *isn't*" snaps Derannimer back, "she *starts* to answer 
the 
> question."
> 
> Angua blinks. "What?" she asks, seemingly confused. "Where?"
> 
> "The second time Ron asks," says Derannimer. "She says: 'Well, I 
was 
> too busy seeing whether you and Harry were okay to--' and then 
Snape 
> cuts in."
>  
> "So *think* about it for a minute." Derannimer angrily folds her 
arms 
> and waits. 
> 
> After a minute, Eileen says, quietly: "Too busy to *what?*" 
> 
> Derannimer beams at her. "Precisely." she says. "Here's what I 
think: 
> too busy to *answer.*

"Well, duh!" says Angua, calmer now.  "That's obvious, I think.  She 
was too busy to answer the question *then*.  But Hermione is still 
avoiding Ron's *real* question.  When he says `What did you say?' 
he's not looking for a play-by-play of their dialogue!  He wants to 
know if Hermione is going to Bulgaria or not."

"Of course," says Susanne stoutly.  "But – err
"  She stops.

"But *what*?" snaps Angua.  "Are you trying to imply that Hermione 
might not have realized that?  Is that what you think?"

"Not me."  Susanne shrugs.  "Derannimer, maybe."

"Even if she didn't realize it *right then*," Angua snarls, "she 
would be bound to realize it sooner or later – probably while she's 
sitting with Pansy Parkinson, pounding her scarab beetles.  The 
*point* is
 she KNOWS that Ron wants to know whether or not she is 
going to Bulgaria, and she never tells him.  Even we, the readers, 
don't find out."
 
> "Which she was telling Ron. But then she was interupted by Snape. 
So 
> she couldn't tell Ron. But she wasn't avoiding the question. And 
> since she wasn't avoiding the question when Ron asked it the second 
> time, I don't she why she would be avoiding answering it the first."

There is a moment of silence.  A breeze lifts Angua's fur and causes 
Susanne to shiver in her wet clothing.

"Derannimer says more here," says Susanne finally.  "She thinks 
Hermione might not have answered Krum for a long time."  She reads:
 
> Derannimer shrugs. "Who's to say that Krum wasn't suspicious at the 
> fact that she didn't answer him and the way she kept cheering Harry 
> instead? Who's to say that *that's* not when he started wondering 
> about Harry and Hermione? Who's to say that he just kept quiet 
about 
> it until he could confirm whether or not Hermione is Harry's 
> girlfriend? Krum's older than she is, and more experienced in such 
> things, presumably--he's quite capable of figuring out that, if 
> Hermione *does* like Harry, it would be awkward for both himself--
> Krum, I mean--and her, if he were to ask her over to Bulgaria. So 
he 
> waits to ask her again until he can talk to Harry." 
> 
> Derannimer pauses. "I really *like* that, actually," she said. "I 
> mean, if Hermione's initial reaction to the invitation is what made 
> Krum suspicious. It's just neat somehow. It gives Krum a 
> definite 'turning point' for his suspicions."

"Is that the best she can do?" Angua says scornfully.

"Well, actually, it sounds pretty good to m
."

"Ha!  Is she saying that Krum would ask Hermione to visit him on 
February the twenty-fourth, and not ask her for her answer until 
after the last week in May?  *More than three months later*?"

"Well, it's possible that
"

"What would he tell his parents?"  Angua is screeching 
now.  "Presumably, he asked their permission – don't you think? – to 
have this girl visit them.  Is he going to tell them she can't 
decide?  They won't know how many beds to make up!"

"Well, maybe
"

"And what about Hermione?"  Angua points a threatening paw at 
Susanne.  "Is she a rude girl?  No!  Remember the Deathday Party?  
Hermione has GOOD manners.  If she's been invited somewhere, she's 
going to respond.  Just because she didn't have time to respond in 
the melee of the second task doesn't mean that she's going to ignore 
poor Krum, his declaration, and his invitation as if they don't 
exist.  It's her DUTY to answer the poor boy."

"I keep telling you," Susanne says, her teeth gritted, "I *agree* 
with you.  I'm just reading what it says on the paper.  Like here
"
 
> "So he may well have asked her again at some other point--and she 
may 
> well have accepted, I don't know. But he may well have asked her 
> again *after* she had her conversation with Ron." 

"Well, sure," says Angua, "but Hermione *still* should have told Ron 
what her plans were. After she knew, whenever that was, she should 
have let him know.  It's the kind thing to do, and it's the right 
thing to do."
 
"Yeah, you said that already – see?"

Angua grabs the paper.  Her mouth moves soundlessly, and she looks 
around, feeling her fur for bugs.  This is too uncanny for a simple 
werewolf to handle.

"I think that was another of your public statements," Susanne says 
comfortingly.

"Oh.  Well then, obviously she couldn't counter that one."

"Errr
"

"What?"  Angua glares at Susanne.  "Give me the da** paper!"  She 
reads unbelievingly:
 
> "I'm saying that Ron isn't *in* suspense for the next six months."
>  
> Derannimer starts giggling. "I'm sorry, you know," she says, "but 
he 
> never mentions Hermione's summer plans once after that 
conversation. 
> Maybe he doesn't care that much." 

"Oh!"  Angua rolls her eyes.  "Can you believe that?"

Susanne rolls her eyes.  "Surely even Derannimer doesn't believe 
that!  Didn't she notice how Ron craned his neck and tried to see 
what Hermione and Krum were talking about when he came to say 
goodbye?  Didn't she see how he examined her face when she came back 
to them?  Isn't it *obvious* that he's still dying with curiousity 
over whether she's going or not?"

"Of course it is!" Angua says.  "And it would be obvious to Hermione 
as well.  Is Derannimer *mad*?"

"Oh, I guess not," says Susanne reluctantly.  She is examining the 
paper again:

> Derannimer stops giggling, and says: "No, I don't really think that 
> he doesn't care. He obviously does. But he really doesn't ask her 
> again--even when she mentions her conversation with Viktor, at the 
> end of the book--in the train compartment, you know, when she's 
> explaining about Rita--even when she mentions it, he doesn't say 
> anything about it."

> And I can't imagine that 
> Hermione would bring it up, if Ron didn't. Answering a question 
about 
> it would be hard enough for her; bringing it up herself would be 
even 
> worse. 

Angua shakes her head.  "You're on a roll, Susanne.  You take that 
one."

"Well, she just *did* bring it up, didn't she?" Susanne says 
quickly.  "She's talking about it right there on the train – it 
doesn't look like she's TOO petrified with embarrassment."

"And even if she was," says Angua fiercely, "she has other options, 
doesn't she?  She can tell Harry, or Ginny, and let them tell Ron.  
What could be easier than that?  If Harry wasn't such an incurious 
PRAT, he'd ask her himself, anyway."

"Errr – maybe we don't want to get into the issue of whether or not 
Harry is curious," says Susanne, looking around in sudden 
fear.  "I've seen articles
."

"Fine," Angua snaps.  "I'm just sayin' – there are ways of doing 
these things."

"Right," says Susanne, nodding in shippy solidarity.  "And – hee hee –
 look!"

"What?"

"She's attacking your Neville parallel."
 
> Derannimer shakes her head. "That parallel doesn't really hold," 
she 
> says. "Neville and Hermione are nowhere *near* as close as Ron and 
> Hermione are; they don't see as much of each other; and Neville, I 
> always assumed, is not as serious about Hermione as Ron is anyway. 
It 
> would be easier to let a classmate/acquaintance down--and I don't 
see 
> Hermione and Neville being much closer than that--than it would be 
to 
> let one of your two best friends down."

"Oh, don't even bother," Angua says irritably.  "Let her think that 
Hermione looks for toads for all her "acquaintances," and risks 
detention to help them with their Potions, and notices when they're 
upset by the Cruciatus Curse.  Fine!  Let her think that Neville 
isn't serious about Hermione, even though he actually had the courage 
to ask her to the dance.  I don't even care."  She stares gloomily 
out, not even noticing the ripple of moonlight over the waves.

Susanne is still looking over the article.  "She's still harping on 
that `too embarrassed' stuff.  She doesn't seem to think that 
Hermione is the right-up-front girl we think she is."

> "Well--look, frankly Angua, I don't consider your scenario to be 
*at 
> all* all right. It reminds me of Mr. Collins's 'elegant females,' 
> actually. I would find it much more forgivable if she refrained 
from 
> telling him because she *didn't* like him--because it was awkward, 
> and painful, and she didn't know how to deal with it, and she 
really 
> *really* didn't want to talk about it, and she just figured that if 
> *he* didn't bring it up, *she* sure wasn't going to. I would find 
> silence out of uncertainty, out of weakness, a *lot* more 
sympathetic 
> than silence out of revenge. 

"Elegant females!" Angua is incensed.  "Ron isn't asking Hermione 
*anything*.  He's not even asking her if she's going to Bulgaria.  If 
there's an `elegant female' scenario around here, it's Derannimer's 
crazy idea that Hermione kept Krum in suspense for months about 
whether or not she would visit him.  We have the author's own word 
for it that Ron doesn't realize his own feelings.  Hermione *wants* 
him to ask if she's going to Bulgaria, but he's not giving her the 
satisfaction.  It's not revenge on her part – it's pique!  Why should 
she tell him, when he won't even admit that he wants to know?"

"I know, I know," says Susanne.  "We all know that.  But Derannimer 
doesn't.  She thinks that Hermione
"  She shudders, but continues 
bravely.  "She thinks that Hermione refuses to face up to unpleasant 
truths.  Look!"
 
> Derannimer stares at Angua. "What? Hermione doesn't refuse to face 
up 
> to unpleasant truths? Hermione doesn't stay silent and stubborn and 
> stiff-upper-lip and wait for the facts to change so she doesn't 
have 
> to admit them?"
>  
> "Her late and unlamented refusal to believe that a teacher could be 
> Up To No Good. Crookshanks. The *Time-Turner.* No, really, House 
> Elves *want* to be freed!" Derannimer cocks an eyebrow at Angua and 
> continues. "The Crookshanks affair may be the best example of 
> Hermione's refusal to face up to What's Really Going On in favor of 
> What She Wishes Would Be Going On, but it's not the only one. It's 
> not a dominant behaviour pattern in her, but it does *exist.*" 
>  
> "See, Angua, I actually have no difficulty believing that, in an 
> extremely delicate and painful situation such as "One of my two 
best 
> friends is in love with me and I'm not in love with him," Hermione 
> *would* try to ignore it--even after she was forced to realize it, 
> she wouldn't necessarily be leaping to confront it. I think that 
> Hermione could rationalize very easily about such a matter--tell 
> herself that Ron had been her friend for ages and this was silly 
and 
> he was bound to snap out of it, etc. I don't think she *would* be 
> able to tell him."

Susanne and Angua are speechless.  How, they think, can she confuse 
Hermione's reluctance to think poorly of her cat or her instructors 
or her own abilities with Hermione refusing to Do The Right Thing?  
When Hermione ratted to McGonagall about Harry's Firebolt, was that 
not a delicate and painful situation?  And what did she do?  She 
bravely faced the boys, and proclaimed what she had done.  Who told 
Harry that his Nimbus had been destroyed?  Who told Harry that he 
might well be the heir of Slytherin?  Who told Ron not to let Malfoy 
get to him?  Who made Harry face up to the fact (as she saw it!) that 
Ron was jealous of Harry getting all the attention?  She wasn't 
ignoring *that* delicate and painful situation!

Susanne and Angua cease their silent communion and rush into speech. 

"She sees a completely different Hermione than we do," says Susanne 
sadly.

"Yeah, a wimpy, SAPPY one!" snaps Angua.  "If her Hermione is as 
awkward and embarrassed as all that, I don't see how she managed to 
tell the boys about Krum's invitation in the first place.  I don't 
see how she managed to say goodbye to Krum with such admirable sang-
froid, or talk so calmly about Krum on the train.  And *what* was the 
little smile all about when Ron asked Krum for an autograph?"

"I know!" Susanne says loyally.  "She can't explain *that* with her 
too-embarrassed-to-think-straight head-in-the-sand-Hermione.

"And here's another thing she can't explain!" proclaims Angua 
triumphantly.  "If she was so embarrassed about the "Ron problem," 
why didn't she use Krum to solve it?"

"Well
" Susanne shuffles her feet.  "Actually there is something in 
the article about that
"

Angua snatches the paper with a wordless growl.  Aghast, she reads:
 
> "First of all, *first* of all: It's *not* 'the embarrassment 
> of "there's just something about you I don't like."' It's *much* 
> worse than that! It's the embarrassment of 'one of my best friends 
is 
> in *love* with me!' It's the embarrassment of 'and things can't go 
> back to the easy way they were when we were eleven!'" 
> 
> Angua starts to say something, but Derannimer, now pacing herself, 
> keeps talking. "It's the embarrassment of 'We've risked our lives 
for 
> each other and fought evil together and now everything is *changing!
* 
> Yikes, what do I do?' 
> 
> "Hermione isn't embarrassed because there's something she doesn't 
> like about Ron; she's embarrassed because there's *something Ron 
> *does* LIKE ABOUT HER!*" Derannimer shouts. She glares at Angua, 
and 
> stamps her foot. Eileen giggles. 
>
> Derannimer shoots Eileen a very nasty look indeed, and continues, 
> albeit rather more quietly. "And pretending to have a relationship 
> with Viktor Krum is not going to remove that essential difficulty."

Angua and Susanne shrug.  "Of course not," their shared look seems to 
say, "but it'd be a start, wouldn't it?"

"You know," says Susanne hesitantly, "I keep trying to think myself 
into the mindset of a Hermione who doesn't like Ron, but it's hard, 
isn't it?  I mean, since we know that she does
."

Angua nods.  "Yes, it is hard.  But let's try.  Okay, best friend 
likes me and I don't like him.  Awkward that."

"Very."

"I'll have to hope he gets over it."  

Susanne nods.  

"Seems like the best thing to do would be to have a different 
boyfriend.  You'd think he'd get the message then, and try to get 
over his feelings."

"Especially if the boyfriend was someone really impressive that he 
had no hope of competing with," Susanne adds.  "Like Krum."

"And what's all this about pretending?" says Angua indignantly.  I 
distinctly remember saying that she should use *whatever degree of 
relationship she actually has* with Viktor.  I didn't say anything 
about pretending.

"Yeah, Pippin said that too!" Susanne offers.
 
> "Who says she has to pretend?" queries Pippin. "What if there 
> genuinely is something going on?"

"Smart hobbit, that," says Angua admiringly.  "Well – Derannimer 
couldn't answer *that*, could she?

"Wanna bet?" says Susanne.  She is getting cranky, possibly because 
of her wet, salt-stiff clothes.  She looks longingly toward the Good 
Ship bar, where the grog is now flowing freely, and lively hornpipes 
are being played.  "Look at this
"

> Derannimer frowns for a minute, thinking. "Well, yeah, but there 
> isn't. I don't think so anyway. Any closet Krum/Hermione shippers 
> here?"
> 
> There is a general non-confirmatory mumble. 
> 
> "Right. Thought not. 
> 
> "So she would have to pretend. And the problems--some of the 
> problems, anyway, I may have missed a few--with that solution are:

"Excluded middle, anyone?" says Angua indignantly.  "There is a BIG 
difference between being a happily-ever-after Krum/Hermione shipper, 
and thinking there is something going on between them in GoF.  They 
had a date, didn't they?  Krum felt he had the right to question 
Harry about his possible relationship with Hermione.  Unless Krum is 
a lot more egotistical than he appears, that's a lot of crust if he 
hasn't met with Hermione once since the Second Task.  If that was the 
case, he wouldn't have *needed* to ask Harry anything.  He would have 
*known* his cause was hopeless."

"Yeah, but she really doesn't like him, does she?" insists Susanne 
anxiously.  "Because, you know, she really likes Ron!  Right?"

"Well, of course," says Angua.  "Everyone knows that
 well, everyone 
who understands JKR's interview responses, anyway."  She firmly 
ignores the sound of a distant voice muttering `Just you, 
then.'  "But that doesn't mean Hermione doesn't have *something* 
going on with Krum, which apparently she is keeping secret, just as 
she kept secret her meeting or meetings with him before the Yule 
Ball, when he was asking her to the dance and telling her about doing 
the Conjunctivitis curse."

"And talking about Harry very often!" Susanne says.

"Err, yes," says Angua, suddenly irritable.  "Those.  Anyway, 
Hermione keeps those meetings secret, apparently.  She could openly 
proclaim them.  *If* she wanted to discourage Ron in an honest, non-
manipulative way."

"Derannimer thinks it *is* manipulative," says Susanne.  She is 
openly shivering now.  "She says it would never have occurred to 
*her*."
 
> b: I don't think that such a bizarrely manipulative solution would 
> ever *occur* to Hermione."
> 
> "Tchah!" says Angua. "*Everyone* knows that trick! Any woman would 
> think of that one!"
> 
> "Not any girl growing up in a more socially-and-culturally-
> conservative-environment, though. Also, not, well--" Derannimer 
> hesitates-- "not me. Actually, it never even occurred to *me*--
before 
> you mentioned the possibility, Angua--that Hermione might have had 
> that option open to her. I'm not a particularly elegant female, 
mind. 
> But I've never really thought of Hermione as one, either."

Angua wishes to point out that Hermione has *already* seen how well 
that "trick" works, with Neville.  Angua also wishes to point out 
that, even if we assume that the Wizarding world is a more socially-
and-culturally-conservative environment than our own, that Hermione 
did *not* grow up in that world.  Angua also wishes to point out that 
the "trick" is very old, and has been used for hundreds of years.  
And she wishes to point out that it has nothing to do with "elegant 
females" if you use it to discourage unwanted suitors rather than 
encourage wanted ones (as Mr. Collins accused Elizabeth of doing).

She also wishes to point out that it's not really a trick, and 
certainly not "bizarrely manipulative" to simply acknowledge the 
degree of relationship that actually does exist.

As I said, Angua wishes to point out all these things, but her 
companion is looking increasingly sullen and edging unobtrusively 
toward the Ship's Bar, so she holds her peace.  Everyone should have 
quick-drying fur and simply give it a good shake, she thinks sniffily.

"We're just going to have to agree to differ, then," says Angua to 
herself, as she watches Susanne disappear into the welcoming warmth 
and light, only to be hailed by a crowd of glad partiers.  

"FrustratedAtCluelessRon!Hermione or TooEmbarrassedToDealWithItAll!
Hermione –  there's really no way to convince Derannimer, if she 
can't see which way the foreshadowing is blowing
"

The werewolf looks up alertly.  "Speaking of blowing!  That's quite a 
gale working up there in the east.  Could be a hurricane, even
."  
She sniffs the fresh air with delight.
 
"What's comin' will come," she mutters to herself, "and we'll meet it 
when it does.  Might blow a few of these cobwebs away, anyway.  In 
the meantime
"


The werewolf paces patiently up and down the deck, practicing 
constant vigilance.  She knows her place.