Cursin’ Draco on the Train (filk)

[Caius Marcius <coriolan_cmc@hotmail.com>]

No: HPFGUIDX 50712

Cursin' Draco on the Train (GoF, Chap. 37)

To the tune of the Statler Brothers' Flowers on the Wall

Hear the original at:

http://www.foxlink.net/~bobnbren/1960s.html#F

Dedicated to Oryomai (inspired by thread #49903)

THE SCENE: The Hogwarts Express. DRACO, accompanied by CRABBE & 
GOYLE, mockingly confronts our heroes. 

DRACO (to HARRY)
You pretendin' you don't know what's comin' down the tracks
But we support the winning side `cause our Dark Lord is back
Four years ago I offered you the chance to join our staff
But you enrolled upon the side of Muggles and riff-raff

DRACO, CRABBE & GOYLE
Count out powers that will fall
You can't handle us at all
Those who cherish their Mudblood shall be thrown out with a thud
Cedric Diggory was just the first to be deep-sixed
And you are all next – everything's fixed

HARRY, HERMIONE & RON 
He's disrespecting Diggory, for Dumbledore lacks awe
What he is lacking for in brains, he makes up in chutzpah
Though fanfic writers sometimes say that Draco will convert
For the moment the best plan's to render him inert

(Enter FRED & GEORGE. All five simultaneously hex the Slytherins, who 
slump over unconscious)

HARRY, HERMIONE, RON, FRED & GEORGE
Cursin' Draco on the train
What an excellent campaign
With the right spells you can place
Tentacles upon his face
Snaky Slytherins have cast their lot with You-Know-Who
But they ought to stick with Winnie-the-Pooh

(Exeunt omnes, purposefully stepping upon each Slytherin body)

    -	CMC



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