With Sheer Monstrosity (filk)

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 54015

With Sheer Monstrosity (GoF, Chap. 27)

To the tune of The Bare Necessities from Disney's The Jungle Book

Hear a MIDI at:

http://www.dismusic.com/allmidi2.htm

Dedicated to Melody

THE SCENE:  Inside a cave, atop a mountain overlooking Hogsmeade. 
Prompted by the TRIO's curioisity, SIRIUS describes the rise and fall 
of Barty Crouch Sr. during Vold War I. 

SIRIUS: A lot of people who were against the Dark Side . . . well, 
you wouldn't understand . . . you're too young. ...

RON: That's what my dad said at the World Cup
.Try us, why don't you?

SIRIUS: All right, I'll try you. . . .Imagine that Voldemort's 
powerful now
..

(music)
It was with sheer monstrosity
And grisly bellicosity
The Dark Lord bought such terror and such strife
And through his fierce ferocity
Each day a new atrocity
Thanks to his animosity toward life

Some wizards he'd torture, some Muggles he'd kill 
A witch, he might scorch her, and seize her will
And you could not tell who was who
Were you for us or You-Know-You?
But Barty C. undertook new decrees
So as to seize all of these DEs 
Without a trial, too

His generosity toward foes was quite subdued
Was quite subdued!

Crouch moved with great velocity
To bring some reciprocity
His aim was to use fire to fight with fire
He gave Aurors authority
To murder the majority
Those whom with Voldemort-ity conspired

BC wants to be head man
See, he'd head up MOM
Then it hit the headlines,
Man, like some bomb 
That brat they call BC (like his Pa)
Lined up with DEs 
(See the shock of Ma!)
So BC Senior used the law
To feed Junior to a `Mentor maw
To prove he hated You-Know-Who

The heartless ironies of life hit hard at them
Hit hard at them

So with Crouch's setback, he blew it
Fell apart in all the polls
The Ministry's head man now Corny Fudge is
BC gave his elf the ax, uh uh
His heart is too hard

His son soon was jailed screaming aloud
By soul-sucking fiends in their dark shrouds
I heard he did not live too long there, he
BC's wife died, he's now solitary
My story's end is grim:
The gaunt vicissitudes of life came home to him.

SIRIUS (joined by the TRIO)
It was the gaunt vicissitudes 
That taunt and then dismiss a dude
That haunted King Macbeth who saw his knife
So let's now insist we conclude 
On Crouch and all his remiss brood
The grim and gaunt vicissitudes of life
The grim and gaunt vicissitudes of life
  
    -	CMC (maybe I should have had Sirius change into Padfoot as he 
sings it, to keep the "Jungle Book" motif)

HARRY POTTER FILKS
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm