TBAY: The Evil That is Crouch Sr. -- "It's Getting Hot In Here!"

[Cindy C.]

No: HPFGUIDX 57812

"What's this?" cried Eileen, suddenly jumping out of
nowhere. "People calling my Barty evil?"

Cindy started, her head whipping around in the direction of the 
Eileen's shrieking.  "Good grief, Eileen.  Do you have to jump out 
at people like that?  Are you trying to give me a heart attack or 
something."  Cindy wrapped her enormous towel around herself more 
securely and lowered herself back to the damp wooden bench.  "And 
close the door!  You're letting all the heat out."

"Well," Eileen said in a small, dejected voice, "Dicentra pops out 
of nowhere all the time, and no one gets mad at her."

"And Dicentra closes the door to the sauna behind her," Cindy said, 
sweat dribbling off her chin into her lap.  "That makes it OK.  You, 
on the other hand, are going to make me catch my death of cold."

Her hand clutching desperately at the flimsy knot in her own towel, 
Eileen reclined on an empty bench on the other side of the sauna, 
glaring at Pippin and Becky.  "My dearest Barty is *not* Evil!"  Her 
voice boomed off the tile ceiling and echoed as though she were 
speaking in a cavernous Star Chamber.  "No. He. Is. Not," she 
insisted. "He's just misguided!  And tragic!  Don't forget tragic!  
Tragic is *hot!*"

"But I think he's evil," said Becky, standing her ground, her face 
flushed.

"That, Becky, is entirely unsupported by the text!" cried 
Eileen. "Barty Crouch Sr. –-" 

"-- is a good guy!" Cindy finished.  She took an enormous swig from 
a bottle of blue Gatorade and flashed Eileen a mischievous smile.


"Hey, that's *my* line!" Eileen said indignantly.  "You despise 
Barty.  You've said it again and again.  You say the man never even 
*repented,* for heaven's sake, and that's critical to Crouch 
apologetics!  What -– what's *wrong* with you, anyway?  Is it the 
heat?  It's the *heat,* isn't it?  You've been in here too long and 
have gone all mental or something."

"No," Cindy said cheerfully.  "I've finally seen reason, that's 
all.  See, you've challenged me again and again to rise up and 
refute your Crouch apologetics.  Each time, I have quickly changed 
the subject.  But with OoP approaching fast, threatening the very 
*lives* of those of us brave enough to remain in the Bay, I thought 
it was time I came clean.  Seeing as how I might be about to meet my 
maker and all.  So I'm converting."

"But -–"  Eileen stammered.  "You –- you *never* admit when you're 
wrong!  I -– where am I?  Am I on 'Candid Camera?'"

"Nope," Cindy said, dialing the thermostat up several clicks as the 
others muttered their disapproval.  "Power is sexy.  I have to give 
you that.  He did try to undo his evil deeds outside the Forbidden 
Forest.  He probably thought he was doing the right thing at all 
times, fighting evil with evil and all.  Now, I'm not going anywhere 
near that foul little Winky/Crouch Sr. ship you've got going with 
Elkins, though.  You can forget that.

"And besides."  Cindy lowered her face and mopped her brow with the 
edge of Pippin's towel, who recoiled in horror and inched toward the 
corner, her eyes fixed on the dirt now streaked across her white 
towel.  "Fair is fair.  If you can't defend a theory in the Bay, 
then you ought to abandon it, don't you think?  I'm pretty sure it 
is in the Theory Bay Rulebook, but this towel doesn't have any 
pockets.  Anyway, I have made no progress attacking Crouch Sr.  So I 
give.  You win.  Uncle.  I mean, that's the right thing to do here 
–- surrender, right?  Imagine that someone launched an attack on the 
Big Bang and I had no answer.  I'd have to sink the destroyer, would 
I not?"

Eileen sat motionless, her chest heaving with each labored breath.

Cindy smiled sweetly at Eileen, who gaped back at her.  "How about 
you pass me one of those CRABCUSTARD things you like so much."  She 
took the treat from Eileen and held it to the light as it oozed all 
over her fingers.  "Uh . . . these things don't need refrigeration 
or anything, do they?"

Eileen shook her head slowly in disbelief as Cindy slurped the 
CRABCUSTARD from the enamel cup in one gulp.  She passed the empty 
cup to Eileen, who held it gingerly between two fingers as she 
pitched it into the trash can by the door.

******************

Cindy