(Filk) "Somewhere I'll Clean"

[arcum42]

No: HPFGUIDX 84290

I'd like to thank Gail for the inspiration on this filk, as the idea
behind it came straight out of some corespondence re: her filks of
LSoH. I was giving suggestions, got carried away, and filked the whole
song... :)

This is to the tune of "Somewhere That's Green" from Little Shop of
Horrors, as sung by Winky (Note: one or two lines were changed in the
filk prior to posting, simply in the interest of good taste...): 

Somewhere I'll Clean

I know Master Barty's the greatest
But I've failed him, come the latest.
So I got a blouse and skirt,
And a matching blue hat.
	
Still, I owe Master my duty
Well, if not, then there's nothing to me.
And I dream of a time
When we can be together again.

A cardboard box of my own.
A tea cozy, folded, dyed pink.
Laundry in the hamper,
Dishes in the sink.

I go to wash and dry them;
Iron Barty's robes with steam;
In Masters house, I'll be there,
Somewhere, I'll clean.

I rake and trim the grass.
Master loves to brood and read.
I cook like Martha Stewart,
And obey the house elf creed.

I dust all the furniture
To keep it neat while unseen.
In the pine tree scented air,
Somewhere, I clean.

Between my home cooked dinner
And bedtime - nine-fifteen
I tuck in Master Barty
And act out scenes from "Midsummer Night's Dream".

Oh, Barty must be lost without me
But he's my Master, he knows best.
He sends an owl to Mad-Eye Moody,
As the sun sets in the west.

A picture of the Crouch home
In Quibbler magazine.
Far from Hogwarts,
I dream I'll go
Somewhere and clean...