(FILK) Tournament of Horrors (Three Filks)

Mon Nov 10 13:30:08 UTC 2003

No: HPFGUIDX 84478

Tournament of Horrors

(A Filked Musical Work In Progress by Gail Bohacek.  Three filks: 
_Tournament of Horrors_ to the tune _Little Shop of Horrors_,  _Goblet
of Fire_ to the tune _Skidrow / Downtown_ and _Da-doo_ to the tune
_Da-doo_)

This musical here has really been stretching my filking ablities.  I
really do hope you enjoy singing along with them as much as I've
enjoyed writing them.

You can find Midis here:  http://addagirl.com/littleshop.htm

Dedicated to CMC
             Constance Vigilance
             and Wendy St. James

**************************************************************

Tournament of Horrors

Act I, scene I

(Cue "Prologue" Music)

(Spot light on Dumbledore as he enters, stage left, in front of a
closed curtain)

Dumbledore:  On the 31st day in the month of October, in an early year
of a decade not too long before our own, the Wizarding World suddenly
had to face a deadly threat to its very existence.  And this
terrifying enemy surfaced, as such enemies often do, under the
seemingly most innocent and unlikely of circumstances. (Exit, stage left)

(Cue "Tournament Of Horrors" Music)

(Enter Angelina, Katie and Alicia, stage right)

Angelina, Katie and Alicia:

Tournament, Tournament a-Horrors
Tournament, Tournament a-Terror
Big event!  Tournament a-Horrors
No, oh, oh, no-oh!

Tournament, Tournament a-Horrors
Excellent!  A musical of Book Four
The advent of Dark Lord Voldemort
No, oh, oh, no-oh

Shing-a-ling, in the beginning
Without a warning 
(Look out! Look out! Look out! Look out!)
Shang-a-lang, Voldy's trap had sprang
Moody's snared (yeah, yeah, yeah!)

Sha-la-la, Harry's light'ing scar
Is a-hurtin' him
(Dumbledore)
Dumbledore, Voldemort he tricked him
And now Potter will be his next victim
He better, Harry Potter better 
Beware!

(Curtain rises to reveal Hogwarts' Great Hall where everybody is
assembled for the Halloween Feast)

Come-a, come-a, come-a
Tournament, not even the Aurors
Can prevent what Voldy has in store
Tournament, Tournament of Horrors
No, oh, oh.
No, oh, oh
No, oh, oh, oh, nooooo!

(Angelina, Katie and Alicia take their seats at the Gryffindor table.
 Enter Harry, Ron and Hermione, stage right)

Harry: I wonder what this "Special Announcement" that everybody has
been hinting at?

Ron: Yeah, and why it's such a big secret?

Hermione: Shhhh, you two...Dumbledore is speaking.

(The Trio sit down at the Gryffindor table as Dumbledore, at the Head
Table, stands to speak)

Dumbledore:  As ever, it is my duty to remind you all that the Forest
in the grounds is out-of-bounds to students, as is the village of
Hogsmeade to all below third year.  It is also my painful duty to
inform you that the Inter-House Quidditch Cup will not take place this
year.

Harry: *What*!

Dumbledore: This is due to an event that will be continuing throughout
the school year, taking up much of the teachers' time and energy - but
I am sure you will all enjoy it immensely.  I have great pleasure in
announcing that this year at Hogwarts we will be hosting the Triwizard
Tournament!

Fred: You're JOKING!

(General excitement is heard from the Company)

Dumbledore: A champion will be selected to represent the three largest
European schools and these three champions will compete in three
magical tasks.  An impartial judge will decide which students are most
worthy to compete for the Triwizard Cup, the glory of their school,
and a thousand Galleons personal prize money!

(Even more excitement)

And now, the moment has come, the Tournament is about to start.  The
casket, then, if you please, Mr. Filch.

(Cue music for "Goblet of Fire")

Katie (standing up):

Argus brings up the casket
And he sets it down
Dumbledore reaches inside
We can not hide our excitement when

(Angelina (spoken): Sing it, chil' !)

The Headmaster says,

Dumbledore:  This is the....

Angelina, Katie, Alicia:

Goblet
For the Tri-Wiz Game
If the Goblet
Chooses your good name
Then the Goblet
Will give you the fame you desire
Goblet of Fire (Goblet of Fire)

Dumbledore: Yes, that's right...

Angelina, Katie, Alicia: Goblet

Madame Maxine: A competition

Angelina, Katie, Alicia: Goblet

Karkaroff:  Where the best school wins

Angelina, Katie, Alicia: Goblet

Fudge and Bagman: We just hope nothin' goes haywire

Company: Goblet of Fire

Angelina, Katie, Alicia:

Three schools, Hogwarts, Durmstrang and Beauxbaton
The Goblet picks for them a Champion
They tell us that there have been casualties before
So to play you must be seventeen or more

The Goblet's surrounded by an Age Line
The twins they tried to cross it but were both declined
The two of them were thrown back and had grown long beards
As everyone watched on and jeered

Dumbledore:  They tried because

Company:                    Fred and George:

Goblet                      When the tasks are done
Goblet                      A thousand Galleons
Goblet                      Will go to the one whose 
                               score's higher
                            Goblet of Fire
Goblet of Fire              Goblet of Fire
Goblet of Fire              Goblet of Fire
Goblet of Fire                

Company:      Goblet of Fire!

Moody!Barty:

You're thinking I'm a friend of D'dore
I'm actually an impostor
Faithful servant of the Dark Lord
In Auror's attire
I'll secretly enter Potters name into the
Goblet of Fire
Pretending I'm Mad-Eye Moody I'll hide
And I'll guide Potter though
Make sure he wins so You-Know-Who
Can return!
                                     Company:

So now the                           Goblet    
I'll easily fool, in the             Goblet
I'll place a fourth school   
This here                            Goblet
Is the perfect tool we require    
                                     Goblet of Fire

Then the Dark Lord will strike just the way he planned
And begin the Fourth Reich with him at command
We are so much alike, it will be so grand
I will be there to fight at his right hand

(Moody!Barty) Dumbledore/Snape/McGonagall 
                     (Company):                                      

(Goblet)
              We're reading the signs   
                      (Wow, it sure would be great if my name's chosen)   
(Goblet)  And things don't look fine 
                      (I would sure celebrate if my name's chosen)
(Goblet)  Different crimes we see have transpired            
                      (Won't be long of a wait 'till they are chosen)
                      (Very soon the Goblet will select them)
               We know that
(Goblet)    Jorkin's disappeared          
                      (Wonder who it will be that has been chosen?)  

(Goblet)    Bryce is dead, we hear     
                       (Move in close, wanna see as they are chosen)
(Goblet)    The situation's pretty dire  
                       (Looks like it is ready, the names are chosen)

                  (It's beginning to glow - it's the Goblet of - )
(Goblet)      (Getting ready to show, this here Goblet of - )
(Goblet)      (In a moment we'll know, from the Goblet of - )
(Goblet)      (Which three names will be thrown from the Goblet of - )

All:           Fire!

(Black out except for a single spot light focused on the Goblet of
Fire, which is glowing magically.  Curtain falls. )

Act I, scene II.  In front of the curtain, the Gryffindor Common Room.

(Enter the Gryffindors, stage right, headed by Fred and George
Weasley.  They are cheering with excitement.  Enter Harry, stage right
.  He is grabbed as the Gryffindors scream, applaud and whistle even
louder)

Fred: You should have told us you'd entered!

Harry: But...

George: How did you do it without getting a beard?  Brilliant!

Harry: I didn't.  I don't know how - 

Angelina: Oh, if it couldn't be me, at least it's a Gryffindor!

Katie: You'll be able to pay back Diggory for that last Quidditch
match, Harry!

Colin: We've got food, Harry, come and have some!

Ginny: Tell us again what happened, Harry!  Tell us again!

Harry: Well....

(Cue music for "Da-Doo")

Harry (lines are spoken)  (Angelina, Katie, Alicia):

(Da-doo!)

Everybody in the Great Hall was waiting in anticipation

(Shoop da-doo)

When the Goblet chose the champion for Durmstrang...

(Krum, da-doo)

The Beauxbaton champion was that silver-haired girl Ron liked...

(Fleur, da-doo)

And for Hogwarts, the Goblet choose Cedric Diggory

(Da da da da da da-doo)

Everybody was cheering the three Champions

(Yeah! da-doo)

And we all thought, you know, that it was all over

(It was through)

When suddenly
And without warning, we saw a fourth name come out of the cup!

It got very quiet, and Dumbledore just stood there looking at the name
on the card for a long while.

(Da-doo)

And when he finally spoke he said the name of the person on the card

(It was you)

But you know, I was totally surprised!

(That's untrue)

Now, I swear that I didn't put my name in,
But they told me I had to play anyway
'Cause those are the rules of the game

(Sha la la, la la la, la la la loooo!)

Fred: Yeah, right.  We know you did it.

Harry: No, really.  I didn't.

(Everybody starts to leave)

Harry: Ron!  Ron, you believe me, don't cha?

Ron: It's okay, you know, you can tell *me* the truth.  If you don't
want everybody else to know, fine, but I don't know why you're
bothering to lie, you didn't get into trouble for it, did you?

Harry:  It's not a lie!  I didn't put my name in the Goblet!

Ron: Yeah, okay.  Only you said this morning you'd have done it last
night, and not one would have seen you...I'm not stupid, you know.

Harry:  You're doing a really good impression of it.

Ron: Yeah?  You want to go to bed, Harry.  I expect you'll need to be
up early tomorrow for a photocall or something.

(Exit Ron.  Black out)

-Gail...more to come later...