TBAY: Bill Weasley is Ever So Evil parts 1 & 2

Tue Nov 25 05:16:22 UTC 2003

No: HPFGUIDX 85823

Erin and Oliver are walking arm and arm along the bright but chilly 
winter shore of Theory Bay, proudly clutching their new BB GUNS 
(Bitter Bill Goes Undeniably Nefarious) under their arms and 
screaming random PARTY LINE (Principled Altruistic Righteous Teacher: 
Yummy Lupin Is Not Evil) slogans at the tops of their lungs.
In the end, Erin reflects as she watches the ships out in the bay 
gliding along under the early morning sun, there can be only one. 

"LUPIN COULD HAVE LET HARRY RUN THROUGH THE ARCH!" Oliver shouts.

"BUT HE SAVED HIM INSTEAD!" chimes in Erin.

One ESE traitor in the Order of the Phoenix....  Though in the past 
she'd been a rather quiet PARTY LINE supporter, Erin's Evil!Bill 
Weasley theory must now make her an implacable foe to ESE!Lupin.  She 
shudders ever so slightly at the thought. No mere mortal is likely to 
relish tangling with the likes of Pippin.

And those ships out in the bay remind her of something, too.... Erin 
dimly recalls promising Abigail yesterday afternoon on the Imperius!
Arthur trimaran that she'd return from her shore leave no later than 
midnight. And here it was, nearly ten in the morning. Oh, well, 
Abigail always slept in on weekdays, so perhaps Erin wouldn't be 
missed yet. 

After a few minutes of these gloomy thoughts, Erin turns to Oliver. 

"So what is it you wanted to tell me about Snape?" she asks.  "That 
was what you wanted to come out here for, right?"

"I have a new idea, and I hated to just throw it down in front of 
George, seeing as he is a Snape Theory and all," says Oliver.

"It was actually you who made me think about it." he 
continues.  "Remember that we were speaking of how teenage Distressed!
Bill was feeling drawn more and more to this mysterious Head of 
Slytherin, the Potions or DADA teacher before Snape? Bill starts to 
think that the triumph of Voldemort is inevitable; just like Peter, 
he reckons the Dark Lord is taking over everywhere.

"And then suddenly everything changed: Voldemort vanished, his mentor 
died or was sent to Azkaban and a new teacher arrived at Hogwarts."  
Olivier says.

Horribly embarrassed, Erin stops dead in her tracks.  "Ah, jeez," she 
mumbles, her face going even redder than her hair, "I meant to 
mention this earlier, but I was just so caught up in getting the Evil!
Bill theory out there...." her voice trails off miserably.

"Go on," urges Oliver, "tell me whatever it is you want to tell me."

"Well, there's no easy way to say this, so I'll just go on and say 
it," says Erin, dragging her toe through the sand as she avoids 
Oliver's gaze. 

"While I absolutely, unconditionally LOVE the idea of the Death Eater 
Slytherin teacher before Snape mentoring ESE!Bill, I'm afraid there's 
just no canon for it.  It makes sense to me on all levels, but I'm 
afraid that if I leave it in there, people might start throwing 
yellow flags at it, and it could even weaken BB GUN.  So I can't 
include it in the official BB GUN theory." 

Oliver quietly looks at the shiny new BB GUN in his hands for a few 
moments. Fearing that he is perhaps contemplating tossing it into the 
ocean, Erin says sorrowfully, "I'm sorry, Oliver. I should have told 
you sooner."

At last Oliver looks over at her. "But the Slytherin Head of House 
left right before Snape got there.  Surely that's suspicious.  He's 
got to be dead or in Azkaban as a Voldemort supporter, doesn't he?"

"It is highly suggestive." admits Erin. "But there was a war going 
on.  Many, many people were killed, on both sides.  The Slytherin 
Head could even have been fighting for Dumbledore.  I know, I know," 
she says as Oliver opens his mouth to protest, "It's not likely.  And 
I like your version so much better. But it's just not enough."

Oliver digests that for a minute, and then says pleadingly, "All 
right, but I don't think leaving out the evil Slytherin Head takes 
too much away from my new theory." 

He continues elaborating it:

"How much does Teenage!Bill know about his new teacher Snape? I would 
say a lot, as he is a very clever boy and his father works at the 
ministry, so my bet is he knows everything about the DE trials. Plus 
we have evidence from Sirius in GoF that these trials have profoundly 
affected the Wizarding World,"

"Yes," Erin breaks in, "This is really the horror of the traitor in 
the Order.  Because even if Bill didn't know all that stuff back 
then, he definitely knows it now.  As well as the details of what 
steps Snape is currently taking to spy for the Order.  Bill sits in 
on all the meetings.  He knows everything."

Oliver goes on, "So Bill knows that Snape was a Death Eater and that 
Dumbledore has vouched for him. And Snape, being the astute, ready-
minded man we know immediately suspects this Gryffindor who seems to 
hang around with Slytherins most of his time."

*********************************
"Bill doesn't like him either," said Ginny, as though that settled 
the matter."
*********************************OoP, Ch. 4

"It fits beautifully in the picture, doesn't it? And thats why Snape 
never stays after the meetings, not because it does not want to see 
Sirius- quite the contrary in fact, he enjoys taunting him whenever 
he can- but because he's too suspicious of Bill."

Erin waits silently for a while then mutters, "This is turning a bit 
scary. The woes of Mrs. Weasley have not yet come to an end, I'm 
afraid. This could very well be true.  Snape has a history of not 
going to Dumbledore with his suspicions.  Remember how in PS/SS he 
tried to deal with Quirrell himself? And the whole shrieking shack 
fiasco?  Snape could just be waiting to deal with Bill on his own, 
which could turn out badly for Bill"

"And I like it also because it brings up another parallel.  That of 
Dumbledore and Riddle.  Just as DD was the only one who suspected 
Riddle, Snape is the only one who suspects Bill.  And he might 
therefore even be the only one Bill fears, because Bill suspects that 
Snape suspects.  Thus the "Bill doesn't like him either" quote."

"Tell ya what, Oliver, this one makes it in under the "possibles" 
section of the theory." 

"Maybe," says Olivier, "we could pay a visit to some less tragic part 
of the Bay one of these days. An Imperio'd!Arthur killing one of his 
own children in front of Bill, thereby turning him to the Dark Side, 
it is a bit too sadistic for me. I was already devastated by Sirius' 
death, see. Besides, it is not like ESE!Bill is already stalking the 
Bay, trying to silence or discredit us BB GUN bearers."

Just then Erin and Oliver hear a loud *pop* from behind them.  Erin 
starts. "Listen, Oliver," she hisses, clutching his arm. "I need to 
warn you, since you're new here.  Be very careful what you say.  You 
never know what you might conjure up."

"What, Fillicidal!Arthur?" asks Oliver, confused. 

"Well, if you don't realize what you just said, I'm certainly not 
going to repeat it for you.  And I don't actually necessarily believe 
in Fillicidal Arthur or the Missing Weasley Child, you know.  But I 
shall insist upon Imperio'd!Arthur as the parent of Evil!Bill at all 
costs."

"Let's go back to the Royal George for another drink," Oliver 
suggests. "My throat is parched after all that PARTY LINE shouting."

"We could even continue talking about Snape there if you like," Erin 
tells him. "I don't think George will care.  He's only really 
concerned with why Snape joined the Death Eaters and why he left. 
But, Oliver, now that I get a good look at you in the sunlight, are 
you sure you're old enough to drink?"

--Erin

TBAY posts referenced in this post:

ESE!Bill parts 1 and 2:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HPforGrownups/message/85610

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HPforGrownups/message/85729

Imperius!Arthur:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HPforGrownups/message/40168

Imperius!Arthur post-OOP:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HPforGrownups/message/77654