Underwear (filk)

[Caius Marcius]

No: HPFGUIDX 79770

Underwear (OOP, Chap. 28)

To the tune of George M. Cohan's Over There

Hear the original at:

http://www.americaslibrary.gov/cgi-bin/page.cgi/jb/gilded/cohan_1

THE SCENE: Hogwarts circa the mid 70s – HARRY, via the Pensieve, 
observes a traumatic scene that SNAPE most wanted to keep hidden from 
him.

SIRIUS
Jamesy, let's have fun, 
Let's have fun, let's have fun
Let us get some one, 
Get some one, some git stun
Bored out of our gourd we see
Snapey skulking furtively
Make him flop around on the ground as he's down
Snivvy we'll expose from his nose to his toes
This a moment, oh so sweet,
To hang Snape up by his feet!

SIRIUS, JAMES, REMUS & PETER
Underwear, underwear
Color gray, color gray, an old pair
We shall make all privy 
To see ol' Snivvy 
Stripped to his skivvies, c'est le guerre!
Vicious glare, greasy hair
Against us he has not got a prayer
We've turned him over, he's up and over
And he's undergoing fits in underwear

(Enter LILY EVANS, deeply angered)

LILY
Jamesy, as your hand, through your hair, hair it runs
Loosen Snapey's bonds, lose the wand, please respond
He's done nothing, I insist 

JAMES
It's simply that he exists

LILY
You make my teeth grate, never date those I hate

HARRY
Father was so rank, what a mean ugly prank
Now my Mother's mad at you and I'm disillusioned too.

(Abruptly, HARRY finds the mature SNAPE standing alongside him. SNAPE 
removes HARRY from the Pensieve memory.)

SNAPE
Did you dare here to stare
To observe, oh what nerve, 
This affair?
That your Dad so charming
His pals disarming
Whose armed harm swarming rips & tears!
This nightmare
Of despair
Say no word
Say no word, do not dare!
With my reproaches, I'm throwing roaches,
And don't you dare come back `cause it's over everywhere!

(Exit HARRY, prestissimo possible, `midst splintering glass, towards 
Gryffindor Tower)

   -	CMC

HARRY POTTER FILKS 
http://home.att.net/~coriolan/hpfilks.htm