The good ship SILK GOWNS
hermionegallo
hermionegallo at yahoo.com
Sun Sep 14 19:08:12 UTC 2003
No: HPFGUIDX 80761
"So, it's settled then, isn't it?" said Captain Jenny, beaming
around at everyone.
HG scanned the dull looks on the faces of the sailors surrounding
Captain Jenny; only one drunken skeptic had replied with more than a
terse question and after doing so had fallen asleep. It was clear
her captain's words had sailed right over their heads, or that her
captain's brilliance had dazzled them dumb. HG had an inkling that
this was going to be a tough crowd
Victory shone on Captain Jenny's face. "Prime salacious idea!
Option number one! Bend!" she cried, waving a fist in the air.
Then, just as suddenly, she straightened her gown, and quietly
announced, "And now, tea." Captain Jenny's eyes twinkled as, humming
to herself, she tottered off below deck. As several onlookers
scratched their heads and turned to leave, HG spoke up. "She's a
genius, you know. Quite mad, of course, but pure genius."
"Sounds like complete gibber if you ask me," one skeptic called
out. "I think we've wasted enough time around here."
HG scrambled to keep the audience. "It's quite simple, really! And
our clever captain wouldn't have been able to do it without most of
you."
Those who were leaving stopped at her words, and taking her
opportunity, HG plunged onward. "Without the Order of the Flying
Hedgehog, none of us here aboard the good ship SILK GOWNS would be so
Constantly Vigilant. The LOLLIPOPS have taught us to scrutinize, you
FEATHERBOAS have reminded us that this is an ugly war. You're all
brilliant in your own ways!"
Murmurs of ascent passed through the crowd. HG continued
quickly. "I'm sure you'd all agree that the Longbottoms' situation
seems suspect. They've been stuck in St. Mungo's for twelve years,
imprisoned in their own brains note the parallel to Sirius Black's
twelve year incarceration! We have seen in canon that the Cruciatus
Curse causes pain that subsides when the curse is lifted; we have
seen that the Imperius Curse can be fought over time. But the
Longbottoms have been imprisoned in a hospital, a place of healing
and recovery, doing neither, for twelve long years. We have a little
ship, perhaps
" and here, HG patted the smooth, shining walnut hull
of the sailboat, "but it's a strong one. Our canons are small but
many, and blowing together they provide quite the bang."
"Imprisoned, you say? Isn't that a strong term?"
"Strong, yes, and most likely accurate. Dumbledore himself has said
there are far worse things than death. Can you imagine being
imprisoned in your own brain, watching your child grow up before your
eyes, helpless to interact with him? It seems plausible to us
aboard the good ship SILK GOWNS that the Longbottoms aren't simply
being kept quiet by insanity, but that there's also an Imperius curse
on them. Note how Alice is described in comparison to Barty Crouch,
Sr. in GoF."
HG proceeded to quote canon, first, the description of Alice in
OoP: " `Her face was thin and worn now, her eyes seemed overlarge,
and her hair, which had turned white, was wispy and dead-looking. She
did not seem to want to speak, or perhaps she was not able to, but
she made timid motions toward Neville, holding something in her
outstretched
hand
' "
HG continued: "Notice the similarity to the description of Barty
Crouch, Sr. in GoF hardback American, p. 553: `He was unshaven and
gray with exhaustion. His neat hair and mustache were both in need
of a wash and a trim. His strange appearance, however, was nothing
to the way he was behaving. Muttering and gesticulating, Mr. Crouch
appeared to be talking to someone that he alone could see
Mr.
Crouch's eyes were bulging. He stood staring at the tree, muttering
soundlessly at it
He looked utterly mad.'"
A sailor cried out, "So Jenny thinks it's the gum that's doing all
this to the Longbottoms?"
"Captain Jenny," corrected HG, "and she admits it as a possibility,
yes."
The sailor continued, "Yeah, okay, Captain Jenny. But Kneasy said
before falling asleep that the gum was the cure, not the cause. Your
captain said nothing about that. Don't you think she's sort of
overlooking the obvious?
"Hardly! In fact, my Captain did address this very issue, which our
intoxicated friend didn't seem to hear. Captain Jenny said
that `candy could be part of the healing process at St. Mungo's, just
as an emotionally unsettling encounter with Dementors can be fixed
with just some chocolate. Part of the therapy for the Longbottoms
could be to give them gum.' Our Butterbeer swilling friend
overlooked this seemingly minor detail: that Drooble's Best Blowing
Gum leaves bluebell colored bubbles that continue to hover for days.
If the Longbottoms were indeed chewing that much Droobles, Ward 49
would be littered with the things. Captain Jenny did say that the
reason there are no bubbles may be because the Longbottoms may not be
getting the therapy, but only empty wrappers."
Someone laughed and shouted, "You don't even know if there is any gum
or not?"
HG remained dignified. "As Captain Jenny said, maybe it's all just
empty wrappers, to make it look as if they're getting their therapy.
Maybe there's no gum, but some other poisoned confection that's
passed off as Drooble's. Maybe Alice isn't taking the gum to chew it
but instead for the message that may be contained in the words. Some
confections are getting to Ward 49, perhaps, but if it is Drooble's,
no one is chewing it or it's not Drooble's, but some tainted
substance, and that's what's contributing to their incarceration."
"So who's behind it, the Healer? She was positively babying Lockhart
and Bode!" A couple of derisive chuckles passed through the crowd.
HG, unflinching, replied, "Aha! You bring me to Healer Strout, who
had to ace her Herbology N.E.W.T., who didn't recognize the
difference between a Flitterbloom and Devil's Snare? Either she's
part of whoever is doing it or, she's affected too, by whatever's
causing it. And Neville's abysmal memory? He has spent enough time
in Ward 49 over the course of twelve years to be affected himself.
Now it could be that Healer Strout and Neville have both had contact
with the wrappers, which could have traces of the contaminating
substance on them. Or it could be something in the environment of
the ward."
A sailor with his head bent low mumbled into his hand, "It's a closed
ward."
"We've learned that the doors aren't imperturbable, from the Weasley
twins, whose Extendable Ears easily wriggled under a doorway.
Noxious fumes seep out from under cracks. And a simple `Alohamora'
opens the door to the `secure' closed Ward 49. The closed ward is
not escape proof, as Lockhart keeps wandering off."
"But who would be doing this?"
"Again, as our steadfast Captain proposed, Lucius Malfoy is a
generous contributor to St. Mungo's. His word is gold around there,
probably quite literally, as it is in the Ministry. Fudge, as
insecure as he is, relies heavily on advice and support (both
financial and emotional) from Lucius Malfoy. He is a primary
suspect. Other crew members have proposed that Uncle Algie or Gran
are behind it, whether for altruistic reasons such as protecting the
Longbottoms from getting re-engaged in the danger they were in
before, or perhaps because of secret Death Eater affiliations. And
thanks to those of you on the MAGIC DISHWASHER, we can also speculate
that Dumbledore himself needs to ensure that the Longbottoms keep mum
about something."
"Okay, that's it " yelled a surly-looking sailor. "Anybody got a
yellow flag on them? I think it's time to start pelting "
Another sailor held him back. "Stop! Stop! There's some meat here,
we have to admit it!" Possibly, she was a MAGIC DISHWASHER crewman.
HG shouted over the swelling sound of voices. "What's certain for
sure is that something suspicious is going on in Ward 49, and that
Alice is trying to communicate with her son. Can we possibly agree
on that?"
A couple of sailors had broken from the group and were heading back
to their ships, but many stayed. A young boy spoke up, his face
contorted in confusion. "But...I asked it before, and I'll ask it
again: why would anyone want to do this to them?"
"My Captain said we don't know. That's the tricky part of our
theory. What do the Longbottoms know that is so significant they
need to be kept alive, but unable to communicate or act? Killing
Bode was simple enough, why not do the same with the Longbottoms?
We've been told by Dumbledore that the Longbottoms "were tortured for
information about Voldemort's whereabouts after he lost his powers"
by the Lestranges. But is that really the information the Lestranges
were seeking?"
HG paused for effect before continuing. "It's quite possible that
the Longbottoms will come out of their long mental imprisonment. If
Malfoy is behind it financially (and as Fudge's puppeteer), it could
be that the interference with the Longbottoms' health could stop with
Malfoy's incarceration in Azkaban, and lead to their recovery. Or,
if the wrappers are indeed a message to be deciphered, Neville
himself holds the clues to the resolution, and he's certainly
motivated to help his parents. (We've even wondered if his reason
for having the Mimbulus Mimbletonia is because he's seeking a cure
for his mum and dad.) But remember our friend, Luna: she's
skeptical, intelligent, and will turn something upside down to
decipher its meaning. She doesn't accept pat, straightforward
explanations, and will closely examine anything suspicious in
nature. If she were to see the Longbottoms and to see Alice give
Neville a wrapper, she would take a new approach to the situation and
very likely discover foul-play."
Several sailors scratched their chins, two were nodding, and a small
faction were shaking their heads.
"Friends," said HG softly, "we didn't say we had all the answers, we
didn't say we had the biggest canons, but small as they are, our
canons are significant, and that's why we saw the need to set sail
into Theory Bay, a community where the best vessels in the
Potterverse dock, the most critical eyes zoom over the most seemingly
inane details crew to crew, ship to ship, we can crack this thing!"
A cry rang out from below the deck: "HG! Get down here! We think
we've got something!"
HG turned to face the crowd one last time. "That's my captain, I've
got to go. This could be it, guys. You know where to find us." And
with a swish of her gown, she'd disappeared below decks, leaving
several curious sailors to try to eavesdrop through the portholes of
the good ship SILK GOWNS.
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