Angry Harry in HBP?

[imamommy at sbcglobal.net]

No: HPFGUIDX 119646


--- In HPforGrownups at yahoogroups.com, "Vivamus" <Vivamus at T...> wrote:
> > imamommy:
> > 
> > I would expect the boy to display the classic five steps of grief:
> > shock, denial, anger/bargaining, depression, and acceptance. 
> > These are the five steps people go through when something 
> > else traumatic happens to them. Each of these steps is 
> > essential to mental health for the individual.
> 
> Vivamus:
> It has been many years, so I could be mistaken, but as I recall, 
the five
> stages of the grief process, as outlined by (I think) Elizabeth 
Kubler-Ross,
> were Denial, Anger, Acceptance, Grief, and Resolution.  

snip
> 
> Sirius was fine, then he was dead.  Even when he was dead, it 
didn't seem
> like he was dead.  It was just a doorway, right?  He had just fallen
> through, and will come right back in a second or two.  The shock in
> something like that is far greater because it is so sudden.  

imamommy:  

Well, I actually was referring to his reaction to the prophecy, and 
those are the way the steps are laid out when somebody finds out that 
they are dying.  
So poor Harry has two new major things to work on:  The Prophecy, 
*and* Sirius' death. And he may have to confront his feelings more on 
Cedric; remember, he kept pushing that issue away.
Harry is going to be going through at least two grief processes, 
although I am sure they will be compounded to make him completely 
miserable for a while.

snip

 If Harry does go through
> the classic grief process, his anger in HBP will be directed at 
Sirius (for
> dying) or at God (or his representative DD) for allowing Sirius to 
die.  He
> may also transfer that anger to Moody, his friends, Umbridge, Snape 
or
> anyone else he can blame instead of the person really responsible 
(himself).
> Guilt from the fact that he truly IS responsible for Sirius' death,
> compounded with all the  anger we already have seen, will tend to 
make both
> the denial and the anger much worse.  

imamommy:

I disagree that Harry is responsible for Sirius' death, at least not 
completely.  Harry made a bad choice, DD made a bad choice, Sirius 
made one, Voldemort made a whole bunch, and Bella made some, too.  
What Harry needs to accept is that sometimes, death just happens.  It 
doesn't always make a lot of sense, there's not always a clear person 
to blame.  JKR said Sirius' death will make more sense to us in 
future books; perhaps it will make more sense to Harry as well.  (I 
still haven't figured out the full importance of this choice.)


snip

Depending on how far JKR wants to go
> down that road, I think we may see a Harry in HBP who is somewhat 
aloof and
> downright mean, for at least part of the time.  Imamommy made a 
good point
> about him changing friends to some from the dark side, for a while.
> Depression is also generally a part of the anger phase, and some 
people
> bounce from denial into anger and depression, then back into 
denial, without
> ever accepting the loss.
>
imamommy:

I didn't necessarily mean "the dark side" as in Future Death Eaters 
of the UK.  I suggested Nott because he is a Slytherin, not 
necessarily "good"  but also not yet proven to be "evil," ie in 
league with Voldemort.  Also, if as some suspect he is the "stringy 
Slytherin boy" in Hagrid's class who can see thestrals, he may have 
some insight for Harry.  Yes, his father's a DE, but we know that 
Teddy himself doesn't necessarily follow the crowd.  
Perhaps Harry will attempt to learn Dark Arts to fight Voldemort, 
perhaps he'll just join Winky in drinking too many butterbeers;P  I 
think for a while he's going to give up on a lot of stuff, until 
somthing catalyzes him out of his self-pity.

snip

 I think Imamommy is also right about
> Harry not wanting to be around Hermione.  Harry -- solid, 
dependable,
> always-there Harry -- will be a drifting wreck of sadness, and 
utterly
> useless for a time.
> 

snip

> I do expect JKR will collapse the process for literary reasons, as 
is her
> prerogative, but I wouldn't expect it to collapse all that much.  I 
think
> JKR wants to go through the grief process with Harry, as he was so 
unwilling
> to do with Cho.
> 
> The deepest question in this for me, is what will resolution look 
like for
> Harry?  Will he be engraged at LV, or quietly determined?  Will he 
finally
> lose his arrogance, burned away by the shame of Sirius' death, and 
see Snape
> as a necessary but unpleasant ally?  Will he learn to laugh again 
by the end
> of HBP?  Most of all, will he ever learn to forgive himself?
> 
> Vivamus

imamommy:

I hope she does indeed take us throught the grief process with him.  
Death is such a major theme in these books, I would feel ripped of if 
she didn't.  But I also hope that Harry can find the source of 
healing and peace that he needs, probably through some sort of 
spiritual experience.  He needs to accept that death happens to all 
of us at one time or another, and tremember that "to the well-
organized mind, death is but the next great adventure."

imamommy