Parenting Harry (was: Re: I don't like him much)

[imamommy at sbcglobal.net]

No: HPFGUIDX 120170


 
> Imamommy before:
> 
> snip.
> 
> (Big sigh!) I don't hate Snape.  I have compassion for him and what 
> he may have suffered.  But I am of the opinion that he is carrying 
a 
> personal vendetta against Harry too far.  He sometimes makes a good 
> point, but I don't think his motivation is to help Harry in any way.
>  
> Unless it's all an act.
> 
> 
> 
> Alla:
> 
> What I said many times. I love Snape's character as a whole, but 
> when I look at him within the story I partially love and partially 
> hate him. 
> 
> I have pity for him, I want him to be redeemed, I admire his anti-
> Voldemort's efforts, but I don't SYMPATHISE with him one bit for 
> having irrational feelings of jealousy and hate towards a child.
> 
> And of course it is only my opinion that he has those feelings 
> towards Harry.

imamommy (in the spirit of open, free discussion with intelligent 
people whom I respect very much):

It certainly started out that way.  Snape seemed to hate Harry from 
Harry's first day at Hogwarts.

But is it changing?

See, I have this theory, part of my parenting philosophy and general 
attitude towards other people, that they will live up to your 
expectations.  Snape has *expected* Harry to be an arrogant, lazy, 
spoiled little toerag.  In many ways, that is *now* how Harry acts 
towards Snape.  From their first encounter, IIRC, Snape cuts him down 
for being "famous," and blasts him for not knowing the right answers 
to questions on the first day of term.  HE treats Harry like he's a 
cocky, no-good punk who's enjoying being the hot gossip, which, IMO, 
he has not.  But after a few minutes, he gets Harry's dander up, and 
provokes him into cheeking him (and yes, I think he was cheeky).  
This pattern continues progressing through the books until, 
ultimately, Harry has become, at least in his interactions with 
Snape, much as Snape expected him to be.  

I do not think Snape's view of Harry is complete, but I think it now 
represents an actual facet of Harry's personality, and now we have 
become locked in a viscious cycle: Snape expects Harry to be a jerk, 
Harry acts like a jerk, so Snape expects Harry to act like a jerk...

I think that both these characters have issues to resolve, and it 
will take something pretty big to heal the wounds they have inflicted 
on each other.

I pity them both.

imamommy